The Summer I Turned Pretty Trilogy : The Summer I Chose Me
by TheSheSwann
Summary: This is the would-be book following "We'll Always Have Summer", by the wonderfully talented Jenny Han. The book takes off when Belly lands in Spain. She is having the time of her life while also receiving handwritten love letters from Conrad. Jenny has touched my heart with these books and I am excited to continue with my own story. Thank you for reading! New chapter every week!
1. Chapter 1

**The Summer I Chose Me**

Chapter 1

"Make sure to carry a little bit a cash with you at all times, not all of the places you will go will accept your credit card." My mother said, she was the adventurer in my family.

She would always go on trips alone and leave me and my brother Steven behind with our dad. As we got older we just started to stay home alone instead. The last place she went was Turkey right after Susannah died. Susannah is my mom's best friend. She calls her Beck – her maiden name that mom refused to let go of after she married Mr. Fisher.

My mom was the ultimate feminist. She took a lot of care to help me prepare for my first trip out of the country. She made sure I had enough Euros, appropriate clothing, enough socks, snacks, and points of interest noted. She thought of anything and everything that would make me have the best time. I loved her for it.

"I will." I assured her. I looked down to my fanny-pack fastened around my waist and made sure I could still see the folded up money in the bottom of my pack.

I could think of a few people that would make fun of my fanny-pack, my brother Steven - of course would never let me live it down, Jeremiah who would call me a dork, and my oldest friend Taylor – who would have heart attack at my fashion faux pau, and, of course, Conrad, who would make me feel like a little kid for it. At that point, I did have all of the cash that she had sent me with. Only because I hadn't gotten to our residence yet for me to stash some away.

"Have an amazing time bean, and make sure you stay with Anika as often as you can. It is always better to stay in groups, at least until you know your way around." Mom advised. I could tell she was both nervous and excited for me considering her calm and strong tone. I thought about the irony of her words too, I mean, she went to Turkey all alone, at least, I think she was alone. She kept that part of her life private.

"I will mom. I promise." I said.

As I have been getting older I have learned to value my mom in a way that I never had before. After me and Jeremiah's almost wedding a year ago (Susannah's second son), I was glad to have her to lean on. It had been a mess. Between Conrad's confession to the amount of money and stress we put on Mr. Fisher I was morbidly uncomfortable around them all. I had been worried about having to be around Mr. Fisher and Jere for a bit after that, only because of all the hype that our wedding had caused, it was embarrassing. I didn't have to worry about Conrad. Conrad went back to California where he attended school. I hadn't seen Conrad since my old bedroom at the summer house when he gave me away to his little brother. Who I didn't end up marrying.

The aftermath of the canceled wedding was one of those times where you just needed to be a shut in with your family for a while, and that was exactly what I did. Just to feel completely stable again. To feel like an effortless little girl again. I was a grown adult who really needed her mommy. I went back home with my mom that day (the day of the almost-wedding) and we spent the rest of the summer in easy comradery, spending time the way we used to when we spent time with Susannah. We watched all of Susannah's favorite movies the rest of that summer, we planted all the flowers in our flowerbed that she loved, and we went to art galleries together. It was the summer we truly bonded and for that time with my mom I was forever grateful.

The funny thing is that Susannah always told me that my mother was amazing and I was lucky to have her. Now, after everything, after my mom was right about not getting married at eighteen almost nineteen. At the time of the engagement, she was so mad and distraught over the idea. I moved out for a bit out of defiance. She told me she wasn't going to come, but she came to support me anyways even though it was all for nothing and my heart swelled for her.

"Good. Well, I will let you go now. I will see you soon, and thank you for calling me to let me know you landed." She said sounding distracted on the other end of the phone.

"Okay, mom. You're welcome, love you." I said as I turned to make sure my rolling bag was still beside me where I left it.

"Love you too Belly."

After I hung up the phone, I did a little freeze-frame hop in the air. I was finally in Spain! I was finally becoming a cultured, independent woman.

Anika was still by the poster of a woman licking an ice cream cone with sprinkles for lipstick. It was a very colorful ad and it had sweets on it so it made me immediately want something sweet.

"Hey did you get ahold of your mom?" Anika asked pulling the brim of her baseball cap down.

"Yes." I said almost bouncing with excitement that we were finally here. I had worked all summer at my old waitressing job at Behrs. They were really happy to see me at the end of last summer when I went home after the canceled wedding, and they were happy to know that no other future possibility of a wedding would keep me from coming back the next summer - this past one.

We headed for the front of the airport where taxis were positioned to pick up passengers. It didn't take us long to get to our residence. It didn't take long because the both of us were looking out the window the whole time internally and externally freaking out.

"This is immeasurably better than campus. I bet everybody else is already wishing for something fun to do." I said gloating over all of our classmates.

"Yeah, let them have their lame parties, we will be in Barcelona for the time being," Anika said with a shimmy.

I giggled and so she started giggling. Our taxi driver clearly didn't speak English and he kept looking back at us in the rearview mirror wondering what in the heck we were giggling about.

Anika was the one that told me she didn't think he could understand. So with her being much better with Spanish than me, asked him how much longer to our destination?

He told her five more minutes, which I was able to understand, but Anika informed me anyways. I was lucky to have her with me, she spoke so fluently that I didn't think we would have much trouble getting around. Now me without her... yeah, that would be a problem. My problem.

We arrived at the place we would be staying. It was a two story stucco building with beautifully decorated tile work up on the walkway and with ferns and flowers all over the front porch. The second floor had a covered balcony that had blooms of plants hanging from it's ceiling as well.

"Oh! It's my two Chiquitas!" A little plump lady came bursting out the front doors smiling from ear to ear. She was adorable. She had a long side braid that cascaded past her shoulder. She looked into her late fifties.

"Hello, I am Estella, like all the stars in the heavens," She said with a very thick and adorable accent.

"I teach you a little Spanish and you teach Estella more English." She said while bringing us both into a big bear hug and kissing each of us on the cheek.

Anika looked over at me like, "What in the world?" She wasn't one that enjoyed a lot of touching. As for me, I didn't mind. Her friendliness reminded me of Susannah. I knew Susannah would've loved her.

"Oh, you girls are very beautiful!" She said touching my new short hair that I had cut on a whim because of the hot temperatures in Spain. I thought of both Conrad and Jeremiah when I did it. They both made comments that I should never cut my hair. I felt sort of liberated when I did it. It was like I had cut my ties with them when I did it. I was my own person now and I didn't need either Fisher boy as mine to be happy. When I mentioned that thought to my mom she was proud, I could tell.

Estella took us around the city, we rode the bus all over to see the sights, which I knew me and Anika would take special trips ourselves so that we could really absorb everything.

As we rode around the boisterous city we learned that Estella was a widow and she had one son named Fernando who lived south of the city doing laboring work. Estella wished that he would come and run his father's business, but he said he didn't want to be stuck inside all of the time. Estella said that one day he will take it over and be thankful for it, but for now, her nephew Carlos was running the shop, since her husband passed away three years ago.

"He needs to give me Nietos!" She shouted and began to laugh as we walked up the path to the house.

We both laughed along with her. She was so welcoming and easy to be around. It was not going to be hard to feel at home in her house. Anika and I had the bedroom on the top level and a bathroom. We also had the front balcony to sit at night to watch people pass by on scooters and listen to the music that played in the streets. The house was just as one would expect on the inside. Reddish-glossed tiled floors all throughout the main floor and wooden plank flooring on the small upper level. There were circular archways between each room and the staircase banister had this wooden handcrafted design that could not be mimicked easily.

"This is amazing," Anika said looking over at me.

"It really is." I agreed.

That night we explored the neighborhood. We followed the smell of something spicy and wonderful and came into view of a little hole in the wall restaurant not even a half a mile away from Estella's. The name of the hole was called Sopresa meaning, surprise – and it was, it was the only restaurant within miles on our side of the city and it was hidden in a little corner. There were a lot of people stuffed into the confines of the tiny place. We squeezed in and saw a spot in the corner at the bar. We had a drink to celebrate the night in our new little spot Sopresa in Spain.

We have been in Barcelona one month today and it has been one of the best times of my life. It was October and it was still hot here. I loved the summertime so I didn't think I would mind not having that fall-ish feeling. I started to feel forlorn when thinking of how I would miss the smell of dried leaves falling off of the trees and bonfires off of campus. I would also miss the pumpkin spice latte at Starbucks, but I was in Spain so I couldn't really complain too much.

When I mentioned my sadness about the pumpkin latte to Anika she laughed at me and told me that she had seen a couple of Starbucks around and was surprised that I didn't.

"What?" I shouted angrily – I was not angry at anyone in particular, but maybe just to the invisible energy that all annoying things came from.

"Hey, don't get your hopes up. I have heard bad reviews about the locations here." She said typing away on her laptop.

"I don't care, take me to one first thing in the morning." I said, now completely happy that I wouldn't miss out on a fall tradition.

It turns out there is no pumpkin spice latte in October in Spain. They just have the regular year round menu. I sobbed a little on the inside.

One day after class I came back home, it was bizarre to call this place home, but for now, that is what it was. I went to my laptop to check my email to see if anything had come from my mother. There was an email from Jeremiah, which surprised me. We hadn't talked much in the last year.

 _Belly,_

 _How is Spain? I bet it is awesome, I missed seeing you and your mom at the summer house this summer. I was sitting in my business class this afternoon, not paying attention – of course ;-) and I was thinking about how weird it was that it was the first summer without you and your my om there. Steve came for a week, which I am sure you know. He hung out with me and Clay. Do you remember him? Yeah, the total tool, but he brings free beer, which I am totally okay with. Steve said you cut your hair. I told him I would have to see it to believe it. You promised me a little over a year ago you would never cut it. But it is okay if you did. Not that you need my okay. I am sure you don't look like a dweeb... kidding! I went to my mom's grave this past weekend when I went home for my dad's birthday. It is crazy that it has been four years since we have seen her._

 _Anyways, I hope you are having an amazing time. I can't believe this is my senior year. Dad is excited about me joining the company next year, can't say that I am not. I can't wait to start making money of my own._

 _Get back to me when you can! Love you Bells!_

 _Jere._

I was surprised to hear from him but glad all the same. He has always been a constant in my life for so long, well up until recently if we are considering the span of my twenty-one years. He has always understood me without me having to put much effort into it, and for a good chunk of my life, he was more than a friend and confidant.

 _Jeremiah,_

 _It is late here and I know that it is mid-day or something around there for you. I am good! Yeah, I stayed in town to work so that I could save up for this trip. Mom went to Vegas and I think she visited Conrad in California since she has never been there before. It was weird for me too. I was expecting you to come drag me out of_ _Behrs_ _and find a reason to go to Cousins with you. Maybe a turtle needed saving or something, but nope – nada. I did cut my hair. It looks different, but I like it. I'll attach a picture of me and Anika in front of the_ _Museu Nacional d'Art de Catalunya. Yeah, I am cultured now – Take it in. Good luck in your senior year, and yeah. You should start paying attention in class for that paycheck! – Not kidding!_

 _I will talk to you soon._

 _Belly_

I attached a photo and pressed send. I didn't want to send him a photo of just me in front of something. I don't know it made me shy and I didn't want to seem like I was bragging or trying to make him regret anything – like losing me or us breaking up. I didn't regret anything we had between us because it was real. Even though it just wasn't meant to be. I received an email back a few minutes later from him, I didn't open the email because I had to go to bed. I sent my mom a quick email. She would be here in a week and I couldn't wait to see her. After all my nightly routines were finished I snuggled into my twin bed next to Anika's and fell asleep right away.

Two weeks later I received a medium sized package. I hadn't ordered anything and I wondered if my mom had sent me something that maybe I had forgotten, although I had no clue what it could be. Estella saw me using a knife in the kitchen to open the box. She was nosy and wondering what I had received from the United States.

"What is in there Chiquita?" She asked hovering close. She always called me and Anika "Chiquita" which made me always think of bananas. Anika and I called each other chiquita banana all the time after we noticed that was what she was going to call us. I first observed the mailing label on the box and saw that it was addressed from California. I only knew one person in California.

"Oh my gosh." I said looking up at Estella. She perked up at my response.

"What is it?" She asked with a panicked expression like someone I loved died or something. Her chubby hand clung to her chest as if her heart was giving out.

"No, no it's not bad." I explained to her. She released her chest as dramatically as she clutched it and let out a relieved moan.

I hadn't heard from Conrad since the day of the almost-wedding. I can still remember as fresh and exactly in my mind the way it felt when his lips pressed against my forehead. I remember panicking and mourning over the fact that I would never hear from him or see him again. Not that it would have ever been true. I decided to be calm as I carefully opened the box and surgically removed two flaps revealing an envelope over the top of the hidden wrapped contents.

"Chiquita?" Estella said, wanting to know what it was. Banana, I thought after the fact. I smiled to myself.

"It's from a ... old friend." I said hoping she would let me read it without interruptions. With her finally knowing, at least, who it was from, she left the kitchen and went into the back garden. I smiled to myself as I opened the letter.

 _["Dear Belly,_

 _Firstly – I don't even know if I should be writing you, if this is allowed. I hope it's allowed. I hope you don't throw this away without even opening the box – because if you do, you'll miss out on something very important. Okay, fine, something that was once very important. To you._

 _I went over to your house to fix your moms computer. I went into your room to use the printer and I saw Junior Mint sitting on the bookshelf, looking pathetic. Remember him? Polar bear, wears glasses and a very stylish scarf?"] –_ I giggled at his description of Junior Mint. _–["I won him for you at the ring toss? Do you remember how you used to go over the ring toss and just stare at the polar bears because you wanted one so bad? I probably spent about thirty or forty bucks trying to win you that damn bear._

 _Apparently, he misses you irrespective of the fact that you left him behind_."] – Irrespective? Okay Encyclopedia boy, I thought and rolled my eyes with a smile spread clear across my face. – [ _"He feels lost without you. I'm serious, that's what he told me. Pathetic, right?_

 _So here he is. Be nice to him, will you?_

 _Conrad_ ] – Excerpt from: **WE'LL ALWAYS HAVE SUMMER- BY JENNY HAN**

I traced my fingers across his signature at the bottom and re-read the letter three times before pulling Junior Mint out of the box and holding him against my chest. I just smiled and smiled that day. I knew Conrad was talking about his feelings about me through Junior Mint. He was lost without me. Ten-year-old Belly would be doing cartwheels across the beach at a declaration like that from Conrad Fisher. But now I was twenty-one year old Isabel Conklin and I wasn't about to just fold and let Conrad off that easy. I ran upstairs to put Junior Mint on my bed and put Conrad's handwritten letter to me in my secret hiding spot where I hide cash and my passport.

I was predictably ecstatic to see my mother when Estella and I picked her up from the airport in Estella's son's work truck. My mom agreed that Estella reminded her of Susannah as well. We ventured all over the city in her five-day stay. She even did some touring of her own when I was in class at the university. We took a billion photos.

I made sure to take pictures in front of a bronzed pig in front of one of the restaurants in the city. I held up a sign from my notebook that said, _Steven_ written in a thick sharpy marker with an arrow pointing towards the pig. I knew he'd respect it and hate it at the same time. I made sure mom held my fanny-pack when I took the picture. I wasn't going to give him the pleasure of laughing at it instead of me laughing at him.

The only thing that stunk about Barcelona was how fast the days seemed to fly by when you were there. It was just that amazing. My mom left just as quickly as she arrived and I missed her so much when she left.

One night about a few days later I was determined to find some sour patch kids. I walked a few blocks around the city until I came across a convenience-like store that I had never been in. They did not have sour patch kids, but I bought some off-brand Twizzlers to tide me over. They ended up tasting nothing like Twizzlers and more like sticks of garbage, so I threw them in a trash can on the sidewalk where they belonged. I walked down a cobbled street I reset to my original goal, determined in my search for Sour Patch Kids. I found that I had taken a wrong turn and had no clue where I was. I doubled back and must've gone left instead of right and thinking about it now I actually was half a block from the convenience store I was just in. I sort of panicked and then ran back the other direction until I saw the clerk from the fake Twizzler store smoking a cigar outside on the sidewalk. Let's just say that was the last time I would go wandering around by myself.

I told my mom about it in an email that night. She responded back immediately the next scolding me for not having Anika with me. Anika was spending a lot of time with Estella's nephew Carlos. She really liked him. I told mom that too so she would forget that I went back on the buddy system.

During me and Ankia's time in Spain, we met a girl named Clara who we had a class with at the University. She was a classic beauty. Long black hair down to her waist. It had the perfect amount of body and she had the prettiest of olive skin. She had the fire that a Spaniard woman should have. She always talked about her failed relationships and what she would do to them if they came near her again, "I will scratch his eyes out!" She would say in the prettiest accent. Every guy back at our college would drool over her, but she was not to be trifled with. No American boy could handle her spirit.

She had two older sisters who were as equally feisty and they would fight all of the time so she would come stay at our place since she still lived with her whole family. It gave her space.

"You would not believe what Therese did to my new blouse, remember I just bought it, and she wore it." She said more, but she started talking in Spanish quickly and things got lost in translation until I heard, "puta" and then knew she was still talking about her sisters.

About two weeks later I was trying to work on a paper while Clara was telling me about the newest man in her life. She always had the most passionate exchanges with men, both good and bad. I was either mesmerized by her stories or scared for the well-being of the boy. Anika entered on the subject of alleyway sex and stopped dead in her tracks, in her hand was a package.

"Whatcha got there?" I asked.

Before I could see the contents of the box my heart already knew who it was for and from.

"It's for you from Conrad," Anika said grinning from ear to ear."

"Let's see," I said reaching for the box. I used my key to the house to open the box. I always had my keys on my wrist with a spiral keychain. It was the gushy kind that was fun to play with when we were just sitting around.

"What is that?" Clara asked leaving the public relations story behind. If I am even allowed to call it that.

"It's from Conrad." I say with a smile.

"Who is – "Clara started, But Anika shushed her and said I would explain.

Again, another letter was sitting neatly above the wrapped package in the box.

[ _Dear Belly,_

 _This is weird, writing to you like this. I think the last time I wrote someone an actual letter was a thank-you card to my grandma. For graduation money, I think. My mom was big on thank-you cards. Oh, by the way, you're welcome for Junior Mint. Laur told me you said thanks. Geez, I was hoping for a thank-you card, but I guess we can't all be as polite as me. Haha.]_ Yeah very funny, I thought smiling wryly _._ I mentally stuck my tongue out at him _. [I should be working on bio-chem, but I'd rather be talking to you. Laurel says your Spanish is getting better. She told me you got lost the other day trying to hunt down a pack of Sour Patch Kids? Really? You're too grown-up for Junior Mint but not for Sour Patch Kids, huh? Here's the biggest bag I could find. It's economy sized. The next time I see you, I'm sure you'll be toothless. But happy. I really do hope you're happy._

 _Conrad_ ] – Excerpt from WE'LL ALWAYS HAVE SUMMER – JENNY HAN

He wanted me to be happy. Conrad I am very happy, I thought. I was beyond excited to open my present in the box this time. It really was the biggest bag of Sour Patch Kids I had ever seen. I let Anika read the letter.

"Wow, he is the sweetest guy in the world." She declared. Anika met Conrad at the almost-wedding, I could tell then she thought he was a great guy, sophisticated, he had his crap together! I remember her telling me.

"Try telling that to Taylor," I said laughing and opening the bag of sour patch kids with Junior Mint on my lap. I stuffed a hand full into my mouth.

"Now tell me who this Conrad is?" Clara asked. I loved the way his name sounded in her accent. She made him sound like a prince or something.

"Oh, he is Belly's epic love," Anika said smiling and picking up Junior Mint for a twirl around the room.

"He is the first boy I have ever loved. He is the son of my mom's best friend Susannah. I think I may have mentioned her to you before. Me and Conrad grew up together." I said. I didn't talk about the Fisher boys much anymore. I spent a lot of time obsessing over each of them. It was now the era of Isabel.

"You didn't tell me you had a boyfriend Isabel?" She scolded. She also wagged her finger. Clara was a very passionate girl and he loved juicy love stories.

"I don't have a boyfriend! He is just a friend." I said defending myself.

"No, you said you loved him." She corrected.

"I do love him, it is just really complicated. Besides, I am just focusing on myself right now." I said folding up the sweet letter.

"Ha! Belly knows complicated, she almost married his brother." Anika laughed. She had her arms crossed, peeking over at me with a smirk.

I gave Anika a look. What a traitor. She just winked.

"Oh my god Isabel you have got to be kidding me, I had no idea you were a little ramera?" She said calling me a harlot. Clara made sure to teach me all of the bad words. Anika laughed because she knew too.

"So you see why it is complicated," I said opening the letter again. He wants a thank-you card. I smile at how he remains so much himself in just a letter.

"Why did you not marry the brother?" She asked.

"Because Conrad told me he was in love with me the night before our wedding. I told Jeremiah, his brother, and things got bad. Conrad said he didn't want me to marry Jeremiah and Jere didn't like that I still loved Conrad as well as him, I mean who would? I would have married Jeremiah that day if he would have been okay with it. He sort of forced it to be over by saying what needed to be said. He did me a favor that day. No, he did us both a favor that day. Neither one of us would have been good at being married. We were too immature." I said as summarizing as best I could. After having an almost solid two years it was easy to examine it now, it was so far away. I remember sitting in my bedroom wishing for the day that it felt like a distant memory.

"Then why were you with the brother anyways?" She asked eyeing my candy. I looked over at her eyeing her for eyeing my candy/present. I'm glad she didn't notice because I have been working on not being such a little baby about things. But people are who they are. I instinctively am this way. That's what happens when you have an older brother, its fight instinct and sometimes flight. If he is coming toward you with the wrath of the titans you run for the hills. Yeah, I always knew when to bail. I think I am hard with change because I am such a grudge holder when it comes to people who change. I realize now that it is why me and Taylor struggled to remain best friends through the adolescence stage of our friendship. I just couldn't stand her boy craziness when I wasn't on her level yet. She had changed. I am starting to accept that everything and everyone does.

"I loved Jere too, he was my first kiss. Now remember, I grew up with these boys, their mom was like a second mom to me. Jeremiah was my best friend too, you know?" I said trying to paint a brief picture of my complicated history. It was difficult to be brief about it. Summers into summers of memories can't be told in a few short minutes.

"So let me get his straight. Conrad told you he loved you after you agreed to marry his brother? The night before your wedding? That is messed up Isabel. You need to be careful with your heart. Don't write him back. If he made you wait to hear that he loved you before the night of your wedding than he needs a taste of his own medicine. He doesn't know what you are doing here. It is probably driving him loco." She said.

She was the master relationship manipulator. But I didn't want to do that to Conrad. Hadn't we played games long enough? Hadn't hiding our true feelings put us in this place to begin with? I was an adult now, I was no longer a silly teenaged girl will a crush. I was an adult that had to make rational life choices and playing with a boys feelings was not one of my priorities. Conrad would call me out on it anyways.

I re-read the letter a few more times and put it with the other.

"Are you going to write him back?" Anika asked.

"It is sweet of him, but not just yet. I am not really sure what to say to him other than, "hey how are you doing?"A lot of stuff has happened and I don't know where we go from here." I explained sticking my hand down in the bag, popping a little gummy kid into my mouth and chewing on the soury-sweetness. Clara finally put her hand in the back and got a small handful of them and smiled at me like a mean little bully kid.

"Yeah you two do have a little bit of a complicated past. Speaking of complicated, Carlos has invited me to go to a matador event, but he invited his friend Benito and wants me to talk you into coming on the date." Anika said smiling sweetly.

"What about me?" Clara asked offended.

"Because you dated his cousin who tells him you are crazy." Anika always gave people the truth, but she did it in a way that took the blow away. Clara rolled her eyes, saying whatever with an eye roll.

"Benito? Is he nice?" I asked.

"Yeah, he is nice and really cute," She said feeling hopeful for a yes.

"Well let me check my calendar." I pulled out my planner for effect and said, "Well it looks like I don't have plans." And I laughed at myself and she laughed too.

"He really is cute, you guys might hit it off," She said smiling and wiggling her eyebrows which reminded me of Taylor.

"It will be fun to have a new friend," I emphasized the word friend.

"Yeah it will be," Anika said with a wink that made me uncomfortable. Wasn't she just cheering for Conrad?

 **That is all for now, SheSwann**

 *** I will try to post a new chapter every Sunday night! Thank you to those who read! ***


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Here I am, sitting with Benito Lafrerra. He is sweet, and handsome too. I have been set up on dates in the past, but this one is different. Why? Because he is so shy! He reminds me a little of Cam Cameron.

Cam Cameron, well Cameron, was my first boyfriend. If you could really call him that. We hung out the last summer Susannah was alive. He was the first boy to tell me I was pretty, which I know it sounds juvenile talking about it after so much time, but no one really knows how much his attention meant to me. He made me feel like I was beautiful and not just dorky old Belly. Like any young woman who feels as though they aren't pretty, being told that you are… wow. It is a feeling that cannot be forgotten easily.

It was hard to go to a matador event for a date. It was really high in energy. It felt like there was so much going on around you. It was very hard to get to know someone at an event like that. It was an experience though. It was an experience that I can tell my kids about one day.

Carlos and Anika find a way to be all snuggly and couple-like. I haven't really dated a whole lot since Jere. Every date since our breakup had felt so awkward and forced that I didn't really get to enjoy myself. Before, I was so used to a date being like an easy hangout, now, it was like:  
"Okay, we are going out, who will pay? What will happen next? You want to stay over? Sorry, I am not that kinda girl!"

It was also hard to date because Jeremiah made it hard. Although we didn't really spend time together last year at school, we would be near each other. I would walk up to a guy and we'd chat for a little while and then he would not come up to me again the rest of the night.

One time, I was talking to Trevor Easton and he was flirting with me and making me laugh. We spent the first half of the party just talking. He said he would go get me a drink and come right back. He never did. When I went to look for him I couldn't find him and I could swear I saw Jeremiah turnaround from talking to Redbird and his other frat buddies and smirk that I was alone, and then he just turned back around. I didn't confront him for it. I just left the party myself.

It is also a lot harder than you think to get to know someone. Maybe it is hard for me because the two really serious relationships to me – were with two people that I grew up with.

Benito was eating a churro and the bottom fell out of it and fell onto his lap. He looked so embarrassed, like he was literally going to pass out. I laughed. I couldn't help it. He started laughing too, which actually really helped out the date. We had left early so that he could change his pants.

The plan had been to meet back up with Anika and Carlos after the match ended. Luckily it was almost over, so I wasn't going to miss much.

"I can't believe I did that!" He said as we walked side by side towards his apartment.

"Hey, it happens!" I said, my legs striding longer to keep up.

He was very tall, taller than most guys I knew. He was handsome in a weird way. I almost couldn't pin point out exactly what it was. His hair waved past his ears. He had prettier hair than me. I didn't think that I could date a guy that had prettier hair than me. Then I saw that he had a little green in his eyes around his pupil and I changed my mind. I think I found his shyness cute too. Probably because he wouldn't try to put on any moves that I wouldn't have approve of. Not that I was a prude I just wasn't interested in anything that I wasn't ready for.

"I hope I didn't ruin your day?" He said looking down at me worriedly.

"Gosh no! I mean it takes a lot to ruin my day. Everyone that knows me well calls me an optimist." I said explaining.

"Optimist?" He asked? He spoke good English, but didn't know all the words.

"It means I look at the bright side of things." I explained.

"That is a wonderful way to be. I like that." He said looking down at me with a sweet smile. I wanted to tell him that I liked his smile, but I didn't have the nerve. Then I remembered Anika's speech to me on the plane.

"You need to be a yes girl. You need to promise me to take chances and scare yourself a little bit. Nothing too serious, but live a little. Make your pulse quicken. You are only in Spain and twenty-one once. Do it right."

With remembering that I swung my arms to release the nervous energy that I had been harboring and spit it out. The compliment I mean.

"I like your smile. I think it is very nice." I said looking up at him to make sure he both heard me, and that he was okay with it.

"I like your eyes. They are like the sky after a storm. Beautiful." He says looking down in them. He was shy with his compliment too.

We spent the night hanging out and listening to live music. He bought me a glass of wine and we shared a slice of pie. We talked about his job and what he did. He was like Carlos with being out of school. He was a banker and enjoyed playing soccer in his free time. He said he went to a lot of soccer matches and that he would love to take me. Yep, he reminded me of Cam for sure. He also took me around for a midnight ride on his scooter, which was much more exhilarating than you would think. The nights had started getting colder so I snuggled close to his back while he would lean back closer to point out different things to me. It was a familiarity that ran shivers down my spine. He made me tickle in that good way.

I couldn't wait to email both Taylor and mom about him when I got back home that night. He didn't kiss my lips, but he did kiss my hand! Swoon!

I decided to tell Taylor first since I hadn't talked to her for so long.

 _Hello my dear friend,_

 _I figured I would tell you first that I met a handsome Spanish man named Benito. If you were here I am sure you would be breaking down the date with me and helping me pick and outfit out for the next one. Yes, there will be a second date._

 _What is he like you ask? Well he is tall. Like six foot four maybe, he has gorgeous hair and light brown eyes that turn green in the middle, and yes he has beautiful teeth – knew you'd be dying to know about the teeth. Anika and I are having a blast here. She has a boy-toy named Carlos. They are pretty serious about each other it seems. We hope you are having and amazing semester. Get back to me about how school is going._

 _Love you,_

 _Belly_

I sent the next email to my mom filling her in about the matador event and that I went on a date too and how it went. She would be proud that I am making memories and well finding lovers. Eww, still thought that word was weird. Lovah. Didn't sound good in any way you made your voice sound. It only made it more awkward.

I also sent Steven a picture of me at a nude beach fully clothed. The people there were all old people and I knew he would be so grossed out. I didn't mind because I had seen way too many naked people in my time there. It was just now big deal, and I had to mess with Steven. In the picture I have two thumbs up smiling obnoxiously and in the second picture I attached I was handing a picture of Steven to an old naked lady and she was smiling it and holding it up. In the email I said that I found his heard and that they missed him. He sent me back a picture of him flicking me off.

On a Friday, about a week later and four dates with Benito, I was sitting on the upper balcony reading a novel for class when I see the mail man bringing the mail. Not that I had made waiting for the mail every morning a priority. It was just nice to spend time getting fresh air in the mornings, while waiting for the mail. The sweet old man waved up at me and I said hello.

As soon as he was out of sight I ran through the door, through the bedroom, and down the stairs towards the front door. I was hoping for a letter from someone back home.

It turns out there was nothing for me, again. Maybe I should make sure I write everyone back when they take the time to send me at letter. I spent the rest of the day keeping busy by adventuring to the beautiful beaches with Anika and Carols. Benito happened to show up that afternoon as well.

The beaches in Spain are so different than the pacific coast beaches, and of course I knew this. The smell was similar, but vastly different in a lot of ways. We were at Nova Icaria Beach, where all of the young people went. I really enjoyed it because there was so much going on. The water was deep aqua in a magical way, but the beach was crowded and back home I had a whole stretch of beach to myself, so being at such a busy one made me have to shift gears for an adjustment. The water made up for it though.

That day at the beach was the first day Benito kissed me. I was lying on my stomach and him on his side facing me. We were each on our own beach towels side by side. He was tracing hearts on my tanned arms, I was almost to the napping stage of tanning when he leaned over and kissed me. It was simple, but unexpected. I didn't say anything after he did it, which was fine. Nothing really needed to be said. I liked him and he liked me.

We sort of became a thing after that. Make out sessions under the stars. Drinks and dancing at the local clubs that included more kissing. He was attractive and carefree now that we had become something. He was also very passionate, as I have learned many Spaniards to be. He is actually the reason I became pretty fluent in Spanish myself. Him and Estella.

It was just when we had found our groove in a relationship when I finally received a letter. My heart felt a jolt and then a guilty pang that reached my stomach from how excited I was to get a letter from Conrad. He always knew when to sweep inn. It is like he had a radar for when I was really happy with somebody else.

I took no carefulness to rip open the letter.

 _[ Dear Belly,_

 _So far I've written you two letters and you've written me – well, none. . . . Which is fine. Go ahead and feel free not to write me back. Seriously, don't feel obligated or anything. Even though I've sent you two handwritten letters and two gifts . . . . But seriously, don't write back. I'm serious. It's better this way. I like hearing my news secondhand, from Laur._

 _Speaking of news, she told me you met some Spanish guy named Benito, and he rides around on a scooter. Really, Belly? A guy named Benito with a scooter? He probably wears leather pants and has a long stringy ponytail. I don't even want to know. Don't tell me. He probably looks like a model and weighs 100 pounds and writes you poetry in Spanish. I don't know what you see in a guy like that, but I don't know what you ever saw in me either, so I guess there's no accounting for taste, right?_

 _Don't forget – don't write back._

 _Conrad. ] –_ _ **excerpt from Jenny Han**_

I couldn't help but laugh at Conrad's stereotypical description of what he thought Benito looked like. I would have to send my mom a picture of me and Benito sooner so that he could find out. Yes, he looks like a model. Not 100 pounds though more like 215. I wish I could scold him about the scooter. I had decided that I wanted to get one when we got home because I loved Benito's so much. So he would have to make fun of me for that too.

Benito taught me to drive his scooter on our third date. It was on a Saturday and the weather could not have been more perfect. We stopped for a picnic and lay down on a blanket at a nearby park. It was a wonderful date. It was the date that made me really comfortable with Benito.

Conrad was teasing me and getting onto me about not responding. No declarations there that would rock my Benito boat. It wasn't like he said, "You are with Benito! It makes me crazy, please stop." I knew Conrad well enough not to expect something like that. Not that I would let it change anything.

I was sad that I wouldn't be home for Thanksgiving, although I knew I wouldn't from the get go. I was really, really sad that day. Benito offered to cook me dinner at his apartment, but I didn't want to. Anika and I decided to stay in our room and have our dinner, which was a salad with chicken in it. Our meal was accompanied with wine. We stated all of the things we were thankful for:

My mom, my brother, dad, Anika, Taylor, the Fisher boys, ice cream with rainbow sprinkles, hot fries from the gas station. Anika laughed at mine. She said her family and Carlos.

"So tell me what the deal is with Carlos?" I asked her. We hadn't talked about their relationship in a while. She swallowed her wine.

"I am in love with him. He asked me to marry him yesterday. Out of the blue." She said hiding behind her hair.

"What? Are you serious? Ann, what are you going to say? What did you say?" No wonder she had been so quiet. Wait, why would she be so quiet about something so serious?

"Well obviously he would have to wait a long time for us to get married, I mean, he hasn't met my parents and I don't plan on living in Spain for the rest of my life. I have a family back home. I don't want to be here forever, and I don't imagine him ever leaving." She said.

"Come on, he is obsessed with you. What did you say to him?" I couldn't help but ask.

"I said I would have to think about it. It made him cry. He took it as a no. I haven't talked to him since." She said sipping my wine now that she finished hers.

"Ann, you need to tell him it is a maybe. Invite him over. Work it out. It is Thanksgiving." I said like Thanksgiving was the answer to everything at the moment. I had to make it a big deal in Spain somehow.

"No we are spending time together tonight." She used me as an excuse.

"Nope, text him right now to get his flat butt over here." I said picking up my empty plate and hers. He did have a flat butt. We called him no-butt behind his back. Anika always blushed when we did. I took the plates down to the kitchen to wash them so that she could call him in privacy.

He came to get her that night. I assumed they were engaged and happy when she didn't come home.

The next day Benito showed up at the house to pick me up for lunch. He was acting weird and I made him tell me what was wrong. We didn't leave the front of the house. We sat on the tile steps of the front porch. We had the whole conversation in Spanish.

"Tell me what's up?" I prodded.

"I just want to know what is going to happen when you go back home?" He said then added, "I know Carlos is going to come with you guys since he and Anika are engaged. What will happen to us?" He said rubbing his hands down his thighs nervously.

I hadn't heard the news about Anika and Carlos so I was reveling in their good news.

"That is fantastic for them! I haven't seen her since last night" I said so cheerfully it made his gloom even worse.

"What do you want me to say Benito? I am not planning on getting married for a few more years or more. I don't have those plans. I have to finish school and find a job back home." I said all of these things uncomfortably. He didn't like it, but he didn't argue.

"We could be happy though, and I am not proposing. I just want to know if you want to try to make this work." He said holding my hands softly. I felt vaguely embarrassed from assuming.

"I bet we could. But, I don't plan on staying here. I will have to finish senior year back home." I said not budging him or giving him any idea that it was a possibility. I liked him but I wasn't interested in a long distance relationship. Relationships were hard enough.

"Well that is unfortunate." He said.

And with that He didn't say anything further and he stood up and walked over to his scooter. He left and he didn't come back. Not even to say, "Hey let's stay friends or Hey let's wait till you leave and decide then." Nothing. Nada.

When Anika and Carlos came back to Estella's there was a massive party in motion for their engagement. I had previously informed Estella and she invited her whole family over for them to celebrate. The family brought cakes and breads and all types of goodies that my mouth watered for. I knew I'd gain a 1,000 pounds after this meal. Estella even had the opportunity to point out to her son that someone would have to run his father's shop. It looked like she would get her way after all.

I emailed my mom that night to tell her about Anika and her long coming engagement to Carlos. Mom had really liked Carlos. I made sure italicize "long coming" to make sure my mom didn't freak out. I also told her about Benito and our break up. I told her I was okay with it because I was. I didn't want to lead him on. He was looking for a future wife. I was looking for adventures.

I received another letter from Conrad a week or so later. I wasn't sure what he'd say in this one. My heart was racing too fast to think too long before I broke down and read.

 _[ Dear Belly,_

 _You didn't write back. I thought for sure you would, you used to be so bad at following directions, now look at you . . . . Kidding. Actually I'm not – remember that time you tried to make box potatoes au gratin and you forgot to put in the cheese?_

 _Speaking of potatoes au gratin, your mom made some for Thanksgiving. Laurel invited us to dinner – my dad and Jere and me. I wasn't sure if Jere would come, but he did. It was awkward as hell. But then Steven put on football and we all just sat and watched and it was better. During the half, Jere asked if I'd heard from you, and I said no. He said you'd been chatting online. He said you cut your hair shorter, that it makes you look older, more mature. Then Laur showed us pictures of when she came to visit you. I want to go there some day. I heard you weren't hanging out with Benito anymore. Don't say I didn't warn you . . . ._

 _By the way it, it looks good. Your hair. I don't think it makes you look older though. Younger, if anything._

 _I might as well be completely honest here, because who even knows if you're reading this . . . you might have thrown it out without opening it, which is your right. But I'll go ahead and say it – it killed me a little that Jere's seen you, talked to you._

 _But I don't think he hates me anymore, which is the important thing._

 _Also – in case I haven't made it clear . . . I think about you a lot. You're pretty much all I think about. Just so we're clear._

 _Conrad ] –_ _ **excerpt from Jenny Han**_

And with the last few sentences I got up on my old twin bed and jumped up and down in a frenzied way. I jumped up and down swinging Junior Mint around like I was thirteen again at the summer house. I even let out one girlish scream. Estella came up to check on me and saw my pure joy and decided to join in with no clue why I was so happy. She was wonderful like that.

I decided not to write back. Not to be a brat, but because I just enjoyed getting these letters. I liked that he was doing the chasing and not me for once. For all he really knew I wasn't getting his letters. But I thought about him every second of every day from that letter on.

Christmas came and Spaniards did celebrate Christmas. It was Christmas Eve and Estella's son Fernando came with his new girlfriend. We gave Estella winks all night in hopes of her getting a grandchild sooner than later. Carlos had been showing Fernando things that he had changed since he had been running the shop. Training him for when he would be leaving with us to the States. Christmas had a different feeling in Spain. We didn't all gift each other, we just spent time together. Although I did buy Anika a personalized tote that said Mrs. Guerrato. She and Carlos freaked. He was so outwardly and not at all embarrassingly in love with her. It made me tear up every time he showed it. He was a man who truly cherished her.

Anika got me some really nice stationary and a smooth and scripty black ink pen which suggestively encouraged me to write Conrad back. She packed it in a brown bag and made Junior Mint hold it. It was sweet.

I sent my mom, Steven, Dad, and Taylor a Christmas gram and a quick email wishing them all a Merry Christmas and that I loved them. Steven got a love ya weirdo. I had to keep face with him.

That night I laid down thinking about Christmas at the summer house when Conrad and I were there together. I laughed at the memory of me thinking he was trying to break inn. I smiled like an idiot at the memory of him popping his head into view after I fell flat on my back sliding around in my pajamas. I wondered if he was at the summer house right now. I wondered if he too, were eating chocolate pretzels in my absence and for my honor. I surely hoped he was thinking about me like I thought of him. I hoped he wasn't alone though. He should never spend a Christmas alone.

A week after Christmas another letter came, and I knew this time I was going to write him back. I had already tossed three drafts into the trash – they all came out too lovey dovey. I didn't think it was right.

I opened his letter hoping for something current to respond too.

 _[ Dear Belly,_

 _It's Christmas here. I guess it's Christmas where you are too. I went to the summer house for a few days. I kept thinking I'd turn around and see you – stuffing your face with chocolate pretzels, or sliding around the downstairs living room in those god-awful mistle-toe pajama pants. I bet my mom bought them for you. She used to buy Jere and me sweaters. There's one horrible family portrait of all of us in red button-downs and reindeer bowties. It's basically a blight on humanity. I hid it in the attic one night and no one's seen it since. If you've been a very good girl this year, maybe I'll show you when you get back. My gift to you._

 _You know what you could give me. A letter back. Hell, I'll even take a postcard. Or an e-mail, Anything. I just want to hear from you. I want to know how you are doing. By the time you get this, Christmas will have passed – I hope it was a nice one._

 _Merry Christmas, Belly. Remember last year? Me and you at the summer house? Best Christmas of my life._

 _Love,_

 _Conrad,] –_ _ **excerpt from Jenny Han**_

After reading it twice I knew just what to say. I didn't wait and I didn't talk myself out of response. I was still in love with this boy and I had to let him know by writing back.

 _[Dear Conrad,_

 _When I come home next spring, you'd better show me that family portrait. Don't you date try to get out of it. Oh, and I'll be taking it with me, since it's my gift and all._

 _And yes. I do remember. Of course I remember. It was my best Christmas, too._

 _Write back soon,_

 _Belly] - -_ _ **excerpt from Jenny Han**_

 ***THAT'S ALL FOR NOW THANK YOU FOR READING* Check back next SUNDAY for chapter 3***


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Five months later…

Carlos had never flown before and we were heading over water. He was freaking out about the flight so bad that he made me start to freak out too. Anika was good with him though. She talked to him soothingly and rubbed his hair in a soft and tender way. He was making me so shaky that I almost wanted her to start rubbing my hair too. The plane was still boarding so we still had about twenty more minutes of his nervous fidgeting, before we had to deal with his anxiety after we took off – which would obviously be worse.

I decided to get my letters from Conrad out of my carry-on for comfort. My bag was up in the top compartment. I had to squeeze past and over Anika and Carlos in order for that to happen. They gave me the window seat because Carlos wanted to be in between us. Like we could really save him if the plane was going to go down? He was a trip.

The pressure I felt building up in my chest popped like a balloon once my hands cuffed around my stack of letters. In total we had exchanged about twenty letters.

My favorite one was the one saying that he wanted to see me a couple of days after I landed.

[ _Dear Belly,_

 _It is one more month until you come home. Can you believe that? It will fly by for you, but it will feel like forever for me. Not that I am counting down or anything ..._

 _I have exams the day you come home so I will still be in California, but I would really like to see you the weekend after. Maybe all of us can go to Cousins. You, me, Laur, Steven, and maybe even Jere, if he would be up for it. I think mom would like that. I don't think all of us have been there at the house together since the summer she got sick again. It would be nice to return to old traditions, don't you think?_

 _Your mom told me a funny story that you didn't think to tell me in your last letter. She told me that you went horseback riding for the first time and fell off the horse. She said that you didn't get hurt, but that you refused to get back on at first. Then she said that you eventually got back on the horse. And you know what? Before she even told me about you getting back on the horse, I knew you did. You are the kind of person that doesn't give up on anything, and that is what makes you amazing. I wonder what your face looked like when you decided you were going to get back on. I feel like I know exactly what face that would be._

 _You could have given up on me a long time ago, and some people would argue that you should. But I am glad that you never did._

 _I can't wait to see you Belly – hopefully (fingers crossed)_

 _Love,_

 _Conrad_ ]

It wasn't that he said anything that made me fall to my knees. It was that he wanted to see me and was willing to come home for the summer from California to do just that. He was ready to move forward with our lives and it gave me hope that I could have everything I ever wanted and more.

The plane took off and Carlos began moaning in terror into Anika's shoulder. He clutched my leg too and when he did it so suddenly it scared me. I leaped up in my buckles and kicked the chair of an old man in front of me. He turned his head between the cracks of the seat and scolded me with one eye. It was harrowing.

I almost giggled at how scary it was. I had felt a plethora of what felt like a thousand sensations from all of the things going around me which left me in a fluster. I blamed Carlos first and foremost.

"Carlos, pull it together man!" I scolded him and looked out the window at Spain disappearing below us. It didn't seem like to long ago when we were first seeing this view and jigging in the seat with excitement over this same view.

Now, knowing that it was time to go home made me long for it. I just wished that I could teleport home instead of take such a long plane ride to make it happen.

It was the same homesickness I felt when it was the last week at the summer house. I was always ready by that time of the last week to get home and sleep in my own bed and get back to the normal things that home meant.

I slept on and off throughout the flight. Carlos finally fell asleep after the first hour, but I felt like he more closely passed out from fear. I wouldn't tell Anika that. What was weird about coming home was that I was coming home with hope. Hope that things could go back to normal – normal being all of us together at the summer house. What was also weird is that I was coming home with Anika and her fiancé. They had only gotten engaged five months ago. They had only known each other for a matter of three months before they got engaged. It was now eight months of them together and they were getting better and better with time.

I never once thought that Anika was moving too fast. She was the girl who always had her head on her shoulders. She was never judgmental or rude to me in all of my juvenile moments of honesty. She never once made me feel beneath her or stupid, so through all of this I didn't judge or think poorly for her for the speediness of the relationship with her now fiancé.

I think what made us great best friends was the effortless tenor of our affection for one another. We were each other's number one fan. Anika and Carlos could prove to anyone who spent enough time with them that they were the real deal.

I was vibrating with anticipation for everyone in the front of the plane to hurry their butts so that we could get off the plane too. I knew my mom and dad were waiting for me outside of the terminal for international flights. I wanted so much to hug and squeeze on the parents that gave me such a wonderful life. I truly wanted them to know how thankful I was for them.

"Look at you Carlos. You are a flight professional now." Anika said rubbing Carlos' back soothingly and praising him.

He glimmered under her touch. The attractive smile he gave her was returned with affection by Anika.

"Welcome to America Carlos," I said hugging him.

"I am so happy to be here finally," He responded taking Anika's carry on and putting it over his shoulder.

"Are your parents already here?" I asked Anika. She looked down at her phone and nodded with a smile.

"Yeah they are. Are you ready to meet my family?" She asked Carlos.

His eyes grew bigger and he grinned. "I can't wait." He all but cheered. Most men in his position would be freaked out by the idea of meeting their fiancé's parents.

Her parents didn't know that she was engaged so they were really walking into an unknown territory. I hoped that her parents were as open as she was, but I feared she would get the reaction my mom gave me at the almost-wedding. They didn't deserve that reaction.

As I collected my bag from baggage claim I hugged Anika goodbye so that I could power walk to the gate to see my parents. I hadn't seen my dad in what felt like a year.

I burst into a run and found my mom and dad talking closely and then looking around for me. I met eyes with my dad first. I grinned and ran over to them, not caring if I looked like I was five years old.

"Belly!" Dad said as I fell into his arms for a hug. I hugged my mom right after. Her hugs were always firm and assuring. This time her hug lingered and she pet my hair as she hugged me tightly.

"It is so good to see you Belly girl." Mom said taking my rolling bag from me and my dad took my carry on off of my shoulder after he noticed what mom did. He tried to take the rolling bag, but my mom scolded him for thinking her incapable.

Dad apologized and looked funny after being scolded by mom.

"It is so good to be home," I said truly meaning it.

"How was your flight?" Dad asked as we were walking out to the car.

"It was okay. Anika's fiance Carlos was pretty much crying when he wasn't passed out. So at first he had me in knots, but once he finally passed out it wasn't too bad." I said giggling at Carlos now that they were gone.

"Poor guy," mom said looking around.

"Where are they?" she asked.

"They left to go find her parents," I said.

"Oh, well. Let's go eat something." Mom suggested.

"That sounds amazing. Let's go to Benny's." I suggested. I really wanted a real American cheeseburger.

"Whatever you want bean." Mom said as we climbed into their car.

When we finally settled in back home dad stuck around to see me for a little longer and left about an hour later. He could tell I wanted a shower and to re-acclimate myself to my bedroom and home. I promised dad that I would see him tomorrow, but he had to host an exam for one of his classes so he wouldn't have time to see me. It was okay though.

I took a shower and settled into my pajamas and fell asleep almost instantly on my bed. Mom came into my room to check on me a few times and to get my clothes to wash from my suitcase.

When I woke up it was four-thirty in the morning and I turned the light on in my room to find that mom had washed and unpacked all of my clothes. I had been fully responsible for taking care of myself since I left and to have my mom again made me feel like the little girl I used to be.

I read a book off of my shelf. It was a book I never finished because I was too caught up with the boys. It was Jane Austen's _Pride and Prejudice._ Susannah had given it to me a few summers ago, and I never really got into it.

By seven in the morning I was to the part were Darcy proposes to Elizabeth in her friend Charlotte's new home with Mr. Collins. My heart raced and I re-read what he said to her.

 _"In vain I have struggled._

 _It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed._

 _you must allow me to tell you how ardently_

 _I admire and love you"_

 _Elizabeth's astonishment was beyond_

 _expression. She stared colored, doubted, and was silent. This he_

 _considered sufficient encouragement;_

 _and the avowal of all that he felt,_

 _and long had felt for her, immediately_

 _followed. He spoke well; but there were_

 _feelings besides those of the heart_

 _to be detailed; and he was not more_

 _eloquent on the subject of tenderness_

 _than of pride. His sense of her inferiority – of_

 _it's being a degradation – of family obstacles_

 _which had always opposed to inclination, were dwelt_

 _on with a warmth which seemed due to the_

 _consequence he was wounding, but was_

 _very unlikely to recommend his suit._

 _In spite of her deeply-rooted dislike, she could_

 _not be insensible to the complement_

 _of such a man's affection, and though her_

 _intentions did not vary for an instant,_

 _she was at first sorry for the pain he was to receive;_

 _till, roused to resentment by his subsequent language,_

 _she lost all compassion in her anger._

 _She tried, however, to compose herself to_

 _answer him with patience, when he should have done._

\- Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice -

And then Miss Elizabeth let Mr. Darcy have it for insulting her about "the inferiority of her birth" and among other comments of disrespect towards her family.

"Oh Darcy, maybe you should have just stopped at the part where you said you loved her." I said to myself.

"What are you reading?" mom asked from the doorway to my room.

"Pride and Prejudice. Susannah gave it to me to read a long time ago,"

"She would," mom said with a reminiscent smile. "Come have breakfast." She added and left the doorway.

I placed a book mark in the place I last read and followed my mom downstairs for breakfast.

She had fixed waffles and bacon. I was starving.

"Steven is on his way home today. He just finished his last exam yesterday evening." Mom said pouring me a glass of orange juice.

"Oh I figured he would have stayed a few extra days." I said sipping from the cold glass.

Mom looked over at me from the sink where she was washing a pan. The look she gave me was observant and then an almost smile touched her lips.

"What?" I asked.

"Steven and I got an invitation from Conrad to go to Cousins for the summer. We are leaving Saturday." She said as she walked with her breakfast plate to sit across from me at the table.

"Oh he invited you already. Good. I didn't know how to bring it up. I didn't want to seem desperate to get to see him." I explained. The sun was shining in full force through the kitchen window. Birds chirped loudly and I had very much missed that noise.

"Yeah I am excited to get to spend the summer there. Although I have to come back for work on Monday. I can't take off work for the summer until June. I will just come down on the weekends," mom explained also which made sense. The college terms always had ended earlier than the public schools did. Although writing gave her a good amount of freedom for her job. It was hard to take off when your publisher was needing something from you.

"That sounds great. I am looking forward to things feeling like they used to; which I know that it will be hard to accomplish it without Susannah, but we can try for her."

Mom agreed with just a look.

Friday evening me and my brother Steven decided to ride down to Cousins because we were so eager to get back there. Mom would come in her own car the next day since she would need her own car. Steven drove because he said he didn't want to ride with me, and he never had allowed me to drive him since he tried to teach me to drive back when I was sixteen.

"I don't mind. It is better if you drive. I love being driven around," I said kicking back and putting my feet up on his dash board.

"Get your filthy feet down from there." He said pushing at my legs.

"Keep your hands to yourself Ste-ven," I said drawing out the words to get on his nerves.

"When do you go back to Spain?" he asked as he backed out of our driveway.

"Never. You'll be spending the next three months seeing my mug every day." I said turning up the radio and rolling the window down.

He groaned and we drove listening to the radio for a while. When he told me he wanted to listen to sports on his satellite radio, so I got out Pride and Prejudice and began to read.

As we neared cousins I could smell the marsh in moist hot air. It must've been a hot day there because of the heat that lingered around.

Steven slowed down without me having to ask as we passed the old surf shops and restaurants. We passed the McDonalds that I got cheeseburgers from for the boys when we were helping Conrad study. It was so familiar but the memory felt like it belonged to such a distant time.

When we pulled up to the house there were two cars there. One was the car that Conrad had owned since high school. My heart leaped at the sight of it. There was also a red sports car. Flashy and expensive and I wasn't sure who it belonged too.

"Is Mr. Fisher here?" I asked wondering if he was going through a mid-life crisis or something.

"No." Steven said turning the car off.

"Whose car is that?" I asked pointing to the red one.

"Oh, that's Jere's graduation present from Mr. Fisher." Steven said grabbing his duffel bag out of the back of his car. I rolled my window back up and got out the car to retrieve mine.

The gravel crunched beneath our feet as we approached the front of the house. I could hear laughter and splashing from the pool.

Steven glanced down at me with a worried expression that I recognized from the rare times when he was protective of me.

It made me wonder if Conrad had a girlfriend or something. Then I shot the thought away. Conrad made it clear I was the only person he was interested inn.

The front door was unlocked and nobody was in sight. I decided to take my bag up to my room to unpack before heading out to the pool. When I opened the door I saw a few large pink suitcases on the floor of my room. There were dresses hanging in my closet and makeup bags spread out on top of my dresser.

I froze and looking around the room with sheer anger. This was _my_ room. Whose stuff is this?

I decided that maybe it was a misunderstanding, so I walked down the steps and went out onto the back patio to find Conrad chatting with Steven and Jeremiah in the pool wrapped around a girl I didn't recognize.

Nobody had noticed me yet. Conrad was the first. It was like time was in slow motion, although my heart was beating out of my chest. His eyes struck with recognition and sparkled with what I could only recognize as happiness when I walked over to him and said hello I was hesitant. I don't know why I felt so shy around him. Maybe it was because we had only communicated through written letters. It would take a minute to acclimate myself to actually being able to see him again. To be near him again.

He pulled me into the biggest hug that I had ever been given. He swung me around in a circle a few times. His face was in my now buried in my now – grown out hair. His arms vised around me and his hands sat on my waist. He pushed me back a little to get a good look at me.

"You look as beautiful as ever Belly," he said pushing my hair away from my eyes from where the summer breeze lifted it in front of my view. It was such a familiar touch. I was thankful for the deep tan I had kept since last summer so that he couldn't see how much his words affected me through blushing.

"You don't look so bad yourself." I said pinching his cheek. His face was already tanned from the sun. His hair looked longer than I had ever seen it, but he still looked clean cut. It was pushed back from his face in a modern style that still looked very much like Conrad. He smiled like a little boy at my gesture.

I didn't take my eyes off of Conrad until I heard splashing and a girl shrieking in the pool. It was weird that they were swimming so late considering the only person who ever swam late was me.

I didn't want to be rude so I walked over to the pool to say hello to Jeremiah, who seemed really, really busy.

"Hey Jere." I said as I stood over them in the pool.

"Oh, hey Belly. When did you get here?" he asked glancing from me to the girl in the pool.

"When Steven did. Did you see him?" I asked motioning over to where Steven was.

"Yeah I did. I just figured you would come tomorrow with your mom." He said not giving me much attention when I spoke again. I gave him what he seemed to want and left him alone.

"Nope I am here." I said as I walked away, so get that girls stuff out of my room. – I wished I could add as an afterthought. I made a point to say that I was going to unpack when Conrad's face reddened. He must've noticed the girls stuff in my room earlier.

"Yeah. Hold on a second with that thought Bells." Conrad said stepping over to the pool and talking softly to Jeremiah. I could hear what he said,

"Hey do you want to go put Melanie's stuff in your room so that Belly can unpack. She will be here all summer and that is her room." Conrad said trying to be polite.

Jeremiah scoffed at him.

"Melanie will be here a lot too, but since she is my girl I will get right on it. The closer the better" He said climbing out of the pool and drying off quickly with his towel to not track in so much water in to the house. Melanie followed right after him. Wrapping a towel around herself before she went through the sliding doors.

Conrad put his hands in his short pockets and walked over to join Steven in one of the loungers and grabbed a beer for himself from the Yeti cooler that was positioned between the two sun loungers.

Everyone was quiet for a minute. Too quiet. I guessed they thought to be awkward because of me, which was preposterous.

I didn't have anywhere to sit so when I decided to head inside.

"Come sit here." Conrad said as he moved his feet over so that could sit on the leg part of the wooden sun loungers. He handed me a beer too. I smiled at him thankfully.

"I need to get the other chairs out from beneath the house. I just got here around three. I haven't had much time to set up the house for the summer" He said making conversation.

"But we always make sure there is beer!" Steven said raising his.

We spent the next thirty minutes catching up and listening mostly to Steven. I could tell Conrad was hoping Steven would go to bed so that we could have some time to ourselves.

I knew he was staring at me as we listened to Steven story about going to an ACC basketball game back in February. I smiled to the ground and snuck a look over at him to see if I was right. I was.

It was twelve by the time Steven said he should go call his girlfriend Katie. Conrad was quick to encourage that.

"Yeah, you better do that. Don't want her wondering what you are doing?" He said taking a sip of beer and raising his eyebrows at me. I couldn't help but smile.

"Yeah true that. Hey, surfing in the morning?" Steven said backing up towards the door.

"Sure." Conrad said.

Steven left to go inside without another word.

Conrad turned his head to me with a smile on his face. I decided to tease him.

"Are you not sleepy Conrad? You old man," I asked turning my legs and crossing them so I could face him better. We were still on the same lounger. I poked his chest with my big toe.

"No, I'm not," he said grabbing my foot. Conrad knew how ticklish I was.

"Don't!" I said widening my eyes for him to know I was serious.

"Don't what?" He asked as if he didn't know.

"Don't you dare think about tickling me." I said.

"Well you didn't think about the consequences for poking a person, an innocent person at that, with your big ginormous toe." He said wiggling the toe I poked him with.

"My toe is not ginormous." I said pinching his arm.

"But it is." He said making a face like he was trying to let someone down easy with bad news that only he knew.

I just laughed. He freed my foot.

"I've missed you." He said looking at me in a way I always dreamed he would.

"I've really missed you too. I have missed you. I have missed this house. I have missed the way my heart races when I am around you." I said the last thing with hesitation, but he was glad I said it. I could tell.

"I know exactly what you mean." He said.

We ended up looking up at the stars for a while. I pulled the neighboring sun chair right beside him so we were both looking up as we did on the only Valentine's day we ever spent together as a couple. He gave me infinity that night.

He told me about school. He started golfing again in his free time and played touch football at a local community center when he wasn't interning at a hospital.

I asked him how much longer he had with school and he said three years.

I fell asleep out on the sun lounger that night and he slept right there beside.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

I woke up to the sound of the ocean and the smell of bacon in the air. It must've still been early because the sun just began to rise over the horizon. I was still on the sun lounger from the night before and I slept well considering I slept the whole night on a hard wood surface. Conrad's lounger was empty of him and I wondered if he had made his way to bed sometime during the middle of the night.

I walked through the sliding doors into the kitchen and found Conrad standing over the stove frying bacon. I walked over to the counter and bounced up to sit beside him as he cooked, but far enough away to not be popped by the grease.

"Did you sleep well?" Conrad asked reaching for his coffee that sat beside me on the counter. He had bed hair and sleepy eyes. I assumed he didn't sleep well.

"Eh, better than would be expected." I said dangling my legs and swinging them like a small child. "How did you sleep?" I asked muffling a smile.

"What?" he asked poking me on the kneecap with his elbow.

"Your hair," I said laughing. He grimaced.

"Well, have you seen your hair?" he asked smirking at me.

"No, is it bad?" I asked raising my hand to check.

"No, not at all." He said grinning at me, which told me not to believe him. I hopped down onto the cool tile and I ran over to the downstairs bathroom to check out my hair. In the mirror I looked rough and ragged with mascara smeared underneath my eyes and hair springing every which way. "Jerk." I mumbled under my breath.

I wet my hair down and cleaned my face with hand soap as a temporary fix. I walked back into the kitchen and hopped back up in my place.

"What are you talking about? I look fine." I said swinging my legs again. He just laughed and continued to flip the bacon.

"Want to help me with breakfast?" He asked raising and eyebrow.

"Do you trust me to?" I asked teasing him.

"I don't know. I will make sure to keep a close eye on you in case you decide to stop measuring stuff for the pancakes." He said laughing. I slapped his shoulder playfully and hopped off the counter.

Shortly after that, he got popped pretty hard with bacon grease and yelped, which made me laugh in victory.

"What are you guys being so loud for? It is like seven?" Steven said shuffling into the kitchen.

"Conrad's being a baby." I said with a small smile as I measured out the flour perfectly.

Conrad gave me a funny look over his shoulder.

"Well breakfast smells good. Belly why are you even up? You never wake up early." Steven pointed out which made me turn and smirk at him.

"I am still on Spain time. This is the latest I have slept inn since I have been home, thank-you very much." I said turning back around to crack two eggs into the bowl of flour and milk.

"You are letting her cook man?" Steven complained as he poured himself some coffee.

"Hey! I am not a bad cook." I scolded Steven.

"Yeah, she is doing alright." Conrad said and then turned to make sure I was doing what he told me to. Almost like he was second guessing himself.

I gave him a scolding look too, which made him laugh and he held his hands up in surrender, spatula in hand.

"You guys underestimate me on so many levels." I said as I took the mixer and set it on low to medium. I stuck the tips of my fingers into the flour bag and put my dusty fingers to my side.

"Hey Conrad?" I said waiting for him to turn and face me, and once he did I flicked a healthy amount of flour into his face. He was shocked by the look on his face and a slow smile began to form on his face. I tried to reach for the flour bag, but before I could reach it he took the bag in his hand and grabbed a handful from the bag and blew it towards my face, and by this time I had crouched down and hid my face so it all just went into my hair.

"Guys!" Steven said with crazed eyes and pieces of hair sticking up on the top of his head.

I grabbed some flour from on top of my head and patted Steven on his face with it. His eyes and nostrils flared as he took the hose from the sink and turned it on and squirted me in the face with it. The water was chilling.

Our loud and messy fight must have woke the other two because they found themselves coming down to check out the ruckus.

"What is all over your face Conrad?" Jeremiah asked pulling out a chair for Melanie.

"You guys made a mess." Melanie said looking around.

"Belly's attempt at cooking." Conrad responded to Jeremiah, his comment prompting me to pinch his elbow. He put his hands in my hair and mussed it like he would if he where petting a dog and it made flour puff around me and onto my shoulders.

Jeremiah turned away and asked Melanie what she wanted to drink.

"Orange juice?" She asked and Jeremiah went for the fridge and two glasses.

I went to start cleaning up the mess we made and Conrad joined me.

Conrad, Steven and Jeremiah were planning on surfing after breakfast and Jeremiah was trying to convince Melanie to join them. I noticed that none of them had never really invited me which stung a little, but it was okay. I had endured my fair share of wipeouts when one of the boys would try to teach me in the past. I just never really got into it as much as they did.

"I don't think so… I would really like to tan." She said glancing over at me comparing our skin tones.

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat as she assessed me. The last thing she needed to do was compare herself to me.

"You don't need to tan. It ages the skin pre-maturely." Jeremiah said. He had never minded my tan before, I thought.

"Maybe next time." She said pulling him down for a deep kiss in front of everyone in the kitchen. We all just looked away.

"Belly maybe you can keep her company?" Jeremiah asked looking at me for what felt like the first time all morning. He was so closed off and very un-Jeremiah-like. It was strange because we shared some correspondence when I was away. It wasn't like I hadn't spoken to him in two years, which was how long we had been apart now.

"Sure, I will just be around the house waiting for mom to get here." I said, because it was true.

I caught Conrad looking at me openly. It was more like gazing at me really. Steven felt uncomfortable so he tried to get his attention to talk about something, but Conrad kept looking at me anyway, so I gazed right back.

Mom arrived around nine and I was so thankful for her presence because it meant I had a solid person here to spend time with as much as I pleased.

I introduced mom and Melanie and mom seemed surprised to meet her because she obviously didn't know that Jeremiah had such a serious relationship and he didn't mention it to her.

She asked the questions I have been wanting to, but I didn't - knowing that it was inappropriate.

"So how long have you and Jeremiah been an item?" Mom asked as the three of us lounged by the pool. Conrad had gotten another chair for mom before heading out to the water. Mom had on her sunhat and sunglasses and a cover up that prevented too much sun from getting to her.

"We have been dating for a month." Melanie explained.

"Did the two of you meet at school?" Mom asked. I knew what she was doing. Screening this girl for Susannah.

"Yeah I just finished my freshman year. I joined Zeta and met him at a Frat party. He was charming and he sang me a song on the karaoke machine in front of everyone. He said that he'd had a crush on me all year and finally acted on it." She said practically hugging herself.

Jeremiah did well, because she was very pretty. She had blonde hair and light blue eyes. They looked like Ken and Barbie when they were together.

"That sounds like Jeremiah." Mom said smiling to herself.

"What are your goals Melanie?" Mom asked. This seemed to stump Melanie.

"I am not sure yet. I am majoring in nursing right now, but who knows?" Melanie said nonchalantly.

I knew my mom would not find that acceptable.

"Maybe you should spend some time traveling so that you can find out if that is something that you are interested in continuing to study." Mom suggested.

"Yeah I have thought about it." Melanie said rubbing more tanning oil into her pale skin.

"Yeah." Mom said deciding the conversation was over. She grabbed her book from the table and began reading.

"So Belly. Are you and Conrad dating?" Melanie asked. I looked at her through my sunglasses.

"I mean we are talking; we haven't seen each other in a really long time." I admitted.

"For some reason J wouldn't tell me. He said Conrad wishes." Melanie said giggling as if she were telling a secret.

"Well I don't think Conrad and Jere talk about that kind of stuff together." I said hoping to silence her on the subject.

"Oh no, Jeremiah talks about Conrad a lot. Not a whole lot of nice things, but he talks about him." Melanie confessed.

"Yeah well that doesn't mean that the two of them talk very often." I didn't understand why after all this time Jeremiah would still hold such a grudge. Especially after he had moved on with Melanie.

"No, they do talk. Conrad has been trying to talk to Jeremiah a lot lately, but J doesn't like to talk to him. He says that Conrad is selfish and he doesn't want him to be a part of his life. I didn't respond immediately, and then I knew what to say.

"I think that you should encourage that relationship. Conrad really loves his brother."

She nodded as if she would think about it, and snuggled into her sun lounger and closed her eyes.

It was around lunch time when the boys came back inn. Melanie had acquired a sunburn, but told everyone it would turn right into a tan, and I couldn't believe her because she was very pale before.

Mom had fixed a good spread for lunch. Different fixings for subs and chips to go along with them. She even sliced a big watermelon and I made a big vat of strawberry Kool-Aid extra sweet. Conrad and I chatted with my mom in the kitchen. They talked about stuff that Conrad helped with around the house as he asked her how the rain gutter was doing since he unclogged it back in the fall.

"It is doing what it is supposed to be doing." Mom said appraisingly.

"Great." Conrad said standing up next to me at the counter eating his sub. He rubbed the small of my back with his hand closest to me. I knew everyone sitting at the kitchen table behind us could see; it was strange because none of them had ever seen him show any affection towards me. Steven had witnessed very little in comparison to what we did do when nobody was around – like make out sessions here at Cousins.

I noticed that Conrad got a glass of water instead of my Kool-Aid. I eyed him.

"What is wrong with the Kool-Aid that I made?" I asked sipping mine from my large glass.

He chuckled and looked at my glass.

"I just don't want to have rotten teeth." He explained.

I feigned offense, "Are you saying that my teeth are rotten Conrad?" I asked.

He gave me his relaxed Conrad smile, "Maybe not right now, but one day, they might just rot right out of your head." He said teasing me.

"Well, you will be surprised to know that I have not had a cavity in my head since I was fourteen." I said crossing my arms over my chest.

"Of course not." Conrad said laughing at me with his eyes.

Later that night all of us went out for dinner. We ate at the place were Jeremiah blurted out that we were engaged. The day that the Woman's Center opened up Susannah's garden. It was the restaurant Melanie picked because Jeremiah asked her if she'd like to go there. Conrad and I exchanged glances as we walked side-by-side into the restaurant.

Me and mom ordered two, "Sex on the Beaches" and the boys all ordered beer. Melanie was too young to order anything, but Jeremiah shared with her.

As we sat at dinner, all in easy comradery, Jeremiah had begun to slowly get terse and competitive with Conrad. If Conrad said that he was interning at a hospital next semester in California, Jeremiah would say that he gets six weeks of paid vacation through their dad's company.

Conrad would say in conversation that the surf in California is good, Jeremiah would say that he joined a football intermural team and they won their small conference. Anything that he could say to one up Conrad he said. Conrad acted unaffected by it, but I could tell that it was grading his nerves a bit. I touched his knee under the table and he turned to see me give him a reassuring smile, and then he visibly relaxed. When I did this Jeremiah scooted back in his chair abruptly and excused himself to the bathroom.

I looked over at mom who stared down at her plate. Melanie didn't seem to mind as she finished off the remaining half glass of Jere's third beer.

"Belly I think you should go check on him." Mom said behind her napkin. I looked over at Conrad who heard my mom ,and he agreed with a reluctant nod.

I backed out of my chair slowly and walked towards the restrooms waiting for Jere to come back out.

He pushed the door open so abruptly that it scared me at first. He looked down at me with a closed off expression and walked past me.

"Jere?" I called for him. He stopped, and acted like it killed him to have to. Like it was such an inconvenience.

He raised his arms like, "What?"

"Walk with me." I said motioning for the door.

We stepped out into the warm summer air and walked towards a bench on the sidewalk.

Once we sat down we sat in silence for a few beats. He didn't make a move to speak first.

"Tell me what all that was about?" I said looking at him imploringly.

"What is what about?" he asked. I rolled my eyes at him.

"That pissing contest with Conrad." I said trying to not sound mad. Jeremiah blew out a hiss of annoyance and stood up.

"Jeremiah." I said reaching for his arm to pull him back down to sit.

He turned and gave me an icy look. I shriveled back and brought my hands to rest in my lap.

"Talk to me." I pleaded.

"So you two are just going to run off into the sunset now that you and I are over?" Jeremiah asked with his hands on his hips not looking at me. I noticed the muscles in his arms and shoulders had gotten bigger since the last time that I saw him.

"What are you talking about Jeremiah?" I asked feeling a flash of guilt and anxiety. He turned his icy glare back on me.

"You know exactly what I am talking about." Jeremiah said with venom and then he added.

"The baking fights and the innocent touching. And the damned staring." He turned away again looking somewhere down the street.

"Jeremiah, we have been broken up for a long while now. You have Melanie and she really likes you, so what is this?" I asked fearing the answer.

He turned back to me and sat down on the bench again. He looked defeated now. Sad. Not the boy that I grew up with, but a bitter man who was angry with the world. What would Susannah say? Would she be mad at me? Would she think it is all my fault?

"I love you the way you love Conrad. How is that ever supposed to go away?" he asked tears brimming his eyes. I felt like such a helpless bitch in that moment, because there was nothing I could honestly say or do to make him happy. In that moment I knew that Susannah would be upset with me. She would be upset that I had ruined her little angel.

"Jere you don't love me. I promise you don't, because you know why?" I asked hoping he would bite and ask me why.

"Yes I do love you. How could you question that?" he asked as if I had betrayed him.

I didn't know what to say to make it better. I knew the answer though, because you brought someone here with you. Someone you are dating, but I didn't say it.

"Jere what are you doing with Melanie? Is she here to make me jealous?" I asked hoping the question would be no.

He sat and put his face in his hands propped on his knees. He talked up at me through his hands,

"You are going to end up with him, marry him, and have his kids." His voice cracked on the last word.

I let out a breath of shock, he was jumping to conclusions that were not even within range of being true. At least not now.

"You guys are going live out the rest of your lives being my mom and dad." He said comparing me to their mom and Conrad to their dad.

"Jeremiah all I can control is what is happening right now and I am telling you how much Melanie likes you and the fact that you brought her here to your mom's house, and that is a big deal. Do you like her or not?" I asked.

He looked guilty and then hid it with a poker face.

"I do like her. Especially more than you at the moment." He said trying to punish me.

"If I was to marry Conrad in the future, would it always be like this with you? A bitter, unhappy version of you?" I asked him.

He shuddered under my words and stood up again. He left me sitting alone on the bench and went back into the restaurant.

"I guess that is a yes." I whispered to myself.

The next few days I tried to distance myself from Conrad. It nearly killed me, he had invited me to go to a movie one night, and to go fishing with him at the pier the following day, but I was afraid of Jere and how it would affect him – and what he would do. Meanwhile, he had been making sure that he and Melanie had loud encounters in his room every night.

Finally, the next Friday, Conrad said that I had to go somewhere with him and that had no choice in the matter, and luckily for me, Jere and Melanie were already gone to a baseball game for the weekend so I didn't have to worry about Jeremiah having another breakdown and perhaps killing Conrad.

We walked along the pier and sat with our ice cream cones on a long rickety bench.

"Tell me what happed outside with Jere the other night." Conrad asked with guarded eyes.

"He told me that he loved me the same way I loved you and basically I would one day end up with his dad." I said telling Conrad the truth.

Conrad's eyes flared with some emotion I was unfamiliar with. He turned squaring his shoulders with me.

"What kills me Belly is how much I love my little brother. I gave you both space after the… after you guys almost got… married. It isn't like I swept you away like I wanted to. But for him to still be acting like this after he brought a girl here, is just something that pisses me off. He brings her here, but guilt's you into thinking you've done something wrong. He is the only one here in a relationship. You and I are unattached. So what if we spend time together? Everyone knows that I am in love with you. At least, they should know by now. I am not going to let him taint this time we have together. This is a really important summer. _This is the summer that I love you_. So, here is what I want you to do. I want you to list the top fantasies you had about me when you loved me first, before I saw you the way I see you now. You mentioned it in one of your letters to me that you used to dream about me doing certain things for you. I want to give it all to you Belly."

I almost dropped my ice cream cone after he spoke. He laughed an embarrassed Conrad laugh and blushed under his tan. I leaned forward and kissed him gently. His lips were soft, but cold from the ice cream. He tossed his ice cream in the trash bin over his shoulder and grabbed both sides of my face and deepened the kiss.

I did end up dropping my ice cream cone, for real.

"So you mentioned to me that you wished that I would have won you a gift because I wanted to impress you, although I have to admit, I won you Junior Mint because I knew you wanted him. Now I want to win you something because you are the girl I am crushing on. Let me win your affection Belly." He said giving me his most gleaming smile over his shoulder.

We were holding hands and walking towards the ring toss. I eyed a pink flamingo with a sunhat with a flower in it.

"I want the flamingo." I said giving him a challenging smile. He smiled down at me.

"You got it." He said with pure confidence.

It took him twenty-five bucks to get it. I tried to tell him it was okay so he would stop spending so much of his money, but he wouldn't have it.

He held the flamingo over his head as he silently asked for a kiss on the cheek by poking his cheek with his index finger. I obliged him very much and very willingly as he turned his face at the last second and I got him on the lips instead, even better, I thought. He gave me the flamingo in return.

"What are you going to name her?" Conrad asked.

"Miss Priss." I replied, not having to think hard about the name.

"Miss Priss?" He asked grinning and shaking his head.

We held hands and walked all the way back to the house.

"She can give Junior Mint company." He said as we walked hand in hand.

"Yeah, she can be his girlfriend." I said fixing her hat that had flopped up in the front.

"Lucky Junior Mint." He said peering down at me.

That night we watched a movie with mom and Steven. We watched, "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" I laughed during the part where Kevin McCarthy's character drug Elizabeth behind him as they ran away from the others. I knew that I couldn't run for as long as they did.

"Isn't it funny how he has been so obsessed with kissing her the whole movie and he loses her anyways?" Steven asked.

"That is not funny Steven!" I declare glaring at him.

"It really is. The entire movie he puts the moves on her and he still doesn't get the girl." He says laughing and stuffing popcorn into his mouth.

Mom rolled her eyes at Steven.

"What I think is funny is that in all of these old movies you can tell they are always in California." Conrad said sitting next to me on the floor in front of the couch.

"Is California is as great as everyone says it is?" I asked him quietly.

He smiled warmly down at me and whispered back.

"It is awesome." He said rubbing the hands we held on our side, and out of view of mom and Steven.

"What does your apartment look like?" I asked. I had wondered about this so much for the past two years.

He looked thoughtful like he was trying to think of a way to describe it.

"It is small. I live alone, so it is just me when I am there. It barely has any furniture because I never have anyone over. It will make it easier for when I move back I can just sell it all." He explained.

"So you are going to move back?" Mom asked him. He turned around to respond.

"Yeah, I always want to be close to Cousins." He said turning back around to see my reaction. I was very happy about that. I wondered where he would work. In Boston?

"You will be an amazing doctor, Conrad Fisher." I complimented.

"Yeah, at least you can get me free medical marijuana." Steven said forgetting mom was in the room. Mom looked over at him.

"He could lose his medical license for writing prescriptions for a totally healthy person." Mom scolded Steven. I smirked at him. "You got in trouble." I sang at Steven.

"Belly I am sure you would fake sick to go in and see Conrad." Steven teased to get me back. Some things never changed, and used to, this would have made me so mad, but now, I laughed because he was right.

"You are right, I would." Then I turned to Conrad, "Help me doctor I can't breathe." I said feigning sickness and acting like I was going to faint.

Conrad grabbed me around my shoulders and pulled me towards him and pecked me on the lips softly. Right in front of mom and Steven. I flushed a little, but I didn't mind because I wanted this. It was never as awkward as it was when Jere would do this in front of my family. It always seemed like he did it for the wrong reasons.

That night we listened to music in Conrad's room. It was still as clean and organized as ever. He wanted to show me a few new bands that he was obsessing over. Houndmouth, Foals, and Saint Motel were the three new bands that he had me listen to. I liked Houndmouth the best.

He also looked shy and I wondered what he was acting so shy for. Then he walked over to his closet and brought over a pristinely wrapped present that was dressed in Christmas wrapping paper. I knew exactly what it was. My eyes lit up and I became a giddy little school girl.

I ripped open the perfectly wrapped paper and saw Conrad with his perfectly combed hair and Jeremiah's wild and blond curls tucked behind both ears. Mr. Fisher crouched beside them looking strong, young, and handsome. Conrad looked very much like him now. Then there was Susannah behind both boys with her arms on each of their shoulders. She was dressed in a red sweater dress looking like the model I always saw her as. She was effortlessly beautiful. I stroked my thumb over her in the photo and tears filled my eyes. This was the best present ever. I busted out laughing at Conrad and Jeremiah. Jere looked proud in the photo smiling the warmest most Jeremiah-like smile and Conrad looked sullen and bored, clearly wishing to be somewhere else entirely.

Conrad smiled at me laughing at the photo. He started laughing to as I described his face.

"Why were you so sad looking?" I asked. He chuckled once more.

"Because on our way there I ran into some kids from school and they made fun of me for it." Conrad said rolling his eyes and laughing.

"You were so cool weren't you?" I said teasing him.

"I really wasn't. I have no idea why you could have ever liked me." Conrad said honestly. His smile was fond, thinking of the memory.

"I liked you because you were kind to me. You were amazing at everything, and I mean everything. Anytime I was on your team doing anything – we won. Remember when we played chicken six years ago and we beat Jere and Taylor?" I asked.

"Yeah, well it just means we are a good team." He said taking the photo from me to get a closer look.

"I remember you making me feel so important. Like, everything I did was important. You don't know how much that has always meant to me." He admitted, and it was something I had never known about.

"Really? It always felt like you never needed anyone's approval." I replied watching him as his mind worked. He didn't speak for a minute as he observed the photo in his lap.

"Look how happy Jere is." Conrad pointed out and we started laughing again. As he smiled down at the photo of his little brother I spoke my thoughts out loud.

"He will forgive us you know." I said hoping he believed me. He looked up at me.

"I really hope so." He said.

I snatched the photo back and told him goodnight. I headed back towards my room. I hung the photo on the empty nail on the wall in my room. It was the most amazing gift he could have given me. He gave me something that meant something to him and equally embarrassed him.

Sometime in the middle of the night I woke up feeling hot. I felt like if I didn't go down to the pool than I couldn't breathe. I quickly changed into my bathing suit and snuck down the stairs out of the sliding glass doors and swiftly dove into the pool. It was a graceful dive that I knew looked good for anyone that could have been watching. I kick-turned as I reached on end of the pool and pushed myself to the other side. Once I was finished letting some energy out I swam to the edge of the pool and looked up at the star filled sky. It was strange to think that something so endless could be claimed by one person. I felt like I owned the sky. But the boy I loved the most gave it to me. So I felt like it was very much mine. Infinity. My infinity.

It was almost June and soon enough my mom would be at the summer house to stay. I couldn't wait for that day because I knew that Jeremiah wouldn't be so cold to me when she would be there all the time.

I was in the kitchen on a Thursday morning when Jeremiah and Steven came into the back door from surfing.

"What's going on Belles?" Jere asked. Looking and sounding a little more like his old self.

"Reading a book, what are you guys up to?" I asked feeling light from Jere's mood.

"Steven and I are going to a concert over at Nell's tonight, are you inn?" he asked.

"Sure, of course, that sounds really fun. Who is playing?" I asked intrigued.

Jere looked over at Steven and smiled. "Steven is dating a drummer. It is girlfriend Katie's band." Jeremiah said reaching a fist out for Steven to bump.

"Wow, Steven who knew?" I said super interested.

The house phone rang and interrupted the conversation. Jeremiah walked over to the cordless phone to answer it.

"She is cool." Steven said going over to the fridge to get a beer.

"But I would really like to finish off the summer here." Jeremiah said sounding stressed.

He noticed me staring and left the room.

"I wonder what that was about?" I asked looking over at Steven. He didn't seem concerned.

"Where is Conrad?" I asked Steven. Steven looked out the window over the sink towards the beach.

"Oh we ran into Nicole on the beach. I think he is out there talking to her." Steven said leaving the kitchen to go into the living room.

I got up and walked over to the window. Conrad was standing on the beach with his surf board propped in front of him in the sand and Nicole stood there in her bikini talking to him. She touched his arm and I stopped watching.

"He likes you Belly." I told myself.

Jeremiah returned to put the phone back on the receiver.

He looked like a pouty little boy.

"Dad is making me come back to Boston and join him and the company on a company retreat this weekend. He wants me to start work on Monday." Jeremiah complained.

"Welcome to adulthood." I said smirking at him.

"Melanie is not going to be ready to go home." He said walking to the fridge to get a drink for himself.

"Well she should stay. It is nice to have another girl around the house." I suggested. He looked over at me to see if I was serious.

"No I would like her to come with me." He said leaving the kitchen to join her by the pool.

Jeremiah and Melanie had gone before me, Conrad, and Steven left for Steven's girlfriends concert. Steven's girlfriend was cool and the band was a jazz inspired band. She wasn't in a rock band like I had guessed. She was beautiful and curly headed in a wild and untamed way. Steven was really lucky to have caught her if you ask me.

I think Conrad agreed too because we chatted about it as they made out in the corner of the party.

"Jeremiah didn't tell me he was leaving." Conrad said as we sat out on the beach that night. He was stroking my knee with his free hand as he held me close.

"Your dad is making him go to the company retreat. Do you think that job will be good for him?" I asked.

Conrad looked down and me and the summer breeze tossed his hair back from his face even more. He seriously had the most handsome face of any man I had ever seen. He was so reserved and intelligent. I felt like I was someone special just to be getting to sit so close to him and hear his thoughts.

"Not really, dad will always baby him. But, maybe once Jere is there all the time dad will get tired of his laziness and help him grow up a little." Conrad said.

"That is a little harsh." I replied.

"You know it is true." He said kissing me on the forehead.

"Yeah, maybe." And I did know.

 ***Keep reading, following and reviewing for more of the story! ***

THANK YOU FOR READING!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

It was June now and my mom is to come and spend the remainder of the summer with us on a full-time basis. I was excited to have her back because she and I were due to go to an art festival in another beach town over. Mom and I had started buying jewelry for each other and for what that we thought suited each other the best. Mom normally didn't wear jewelry, but recently I had noticed her wearing a necklace that used to be Susannah's so I was capitalizing on that.

Conrad joined me in the living room as I drank my coffee and waited for the weatherman to forecast the weather for today and the weekend.

"Hey Belly, what time did your mom say she would be here?" he asked joining me with his own coffee.

"She should be here in the next hour. She texted me early this morning that she was coming down." I said rubbing down his bed hair. He smiled over at me. I could see the steam from his coffee floating out of his white mug.

"You two are going to that art fair today right?" he asked, sipping at his coffee. It must have burnt his tongue because he made a face.

"Yes, you are welcome to come with us." I said grinning at him. I knew he wouldn't want to though.

He looked over at me pained.

"No thank you." He said shaking his head.

"And why not?" I asked turning towards him to get onto his case.

"Because that is what you women do. Us men go out and surf and build fires." He said, and I knew he was joking from his tone.

"Yeah, don't joke like that in front of mom. She would have your head." I said turning the volume up on the TV when the frantic looking weatherman came into view.

"Sunny skies today with some clouds rolling in late tonight, and a chance of rain this weekend. Might keep some of you beach-goers inside for the first time this season." The man said opening an umbrella to make the effect.

"I hope he gets some bad luck for opening up that umbrella in-studio." I said annoyed at him and his forecast.

Conrad turned to me mock-offended on behalf of the weatherman. "Isabel Conklin, you are not a nice young woman." Conrad said tisking me with just the sound and no fingers.

"You know that he is obnoxious." I said crossing my arms.

"He is just trying to entertain the people, Belly." Conrad said trying to stay serious.

"No, not even old people would enjoy that. They would be offended by his tackiness."

"Ha, you are probably right." He said putting his mug down on the coffee table and holding me close.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" I asked smelling his hair. His head rested on my chest.

"I don't know. How long are you going to be gone?" he asked.

"I don't know. Why do you ask?" I asked him with a smile.

"Because I don't know if I want to be away from you for too long." He said turning to smile up at me. He still didn't realize how much more obsessed I was with him than he was with me, and to hear those words come from his mouth still felt like a dream. A dream I was reluctant to wake up from.

I leaned down to kiss him softly and he returned the kiss with fervor.

"Well, well, well, look what is happening in here Laurel." I heard my best friend Taylor's voice from the doorway. Her voice as coy as ever. She stood in the opening of the living room in her short shorts and a woven tank top. Her sunglasses were perched on top of her head and her hair was cut into a cute bob. It had been such a long time since I had seen her.

"What?" Mom asked coming in to see me and Conrad snuggling on the couch. Our faces were still close together from our kiss.

"Taylor!" I said screaming into Conrad's face. Conrad lifted his head off of me so that I could get up to greet my friend that I had not seen in forever. He acted like his ears were bleeding, the jerk.

I ran over to her and gave her a hug. "What are you doing here?" I asked. And I touched her new hair and she smiled with appreciation.

"I ran into your mom in town yesterday and she said you were here for the summer and she invited me. I hope it is okay?" she asked.

I balked, "Of course it is! Tay, I am so happy to see you."

She finally hugged me back. It made me feel bad that she was so worried about my reaction. It had been a long time since she had last come to stay at the summer house, the time when it didn't end so well. When she finished off the summer making out with my brother. I still shriveled over the grossness of the idea of them together.

"Hey Conrad." Taylor said winking at him. He just gave her a lazy wave.

"So are you guys, like, finally together now?" She asked Conrad directly.

"That is up to Belly." Conrad said standing up and smiling down at me.

I was embarrassed to say the least so I only smiled. He smiled too.

Taylor squinted her eyes at him giving him a perplexed and unsure look. "Just as long as this is serious Conrad." Taylor lectured him. She looked smug, seeming satisfied with her defensiveness over me, and turning back to me.

"Belly you look like a total babe, you're tan already!" She said putting her arm next to mind for emphasis.

"Laur, do you need help with bags?" Conrad asked.

"Yes please." Mom said.

"Mine too, Con." Taylor added winking again treated him like a bell-boy at a fancy hotel. If only she had a fifty propped between two manicured fingers waving them over her head like in a thirties movie.

He just nodded with a smile.

"So you need to tell me what has been going on Belly." Taylor said dragging me over to the couch for a pow-wow.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I mean like what is going on with you and Conrad? Like when did you start hanging out with him again?" She asked. Her blue eyes piercing with curiosity and wonder.

"He starting writing me letters when I left for Spain and we just kept in touch that way. And of course coming back here helps with the hanging out with him part." I said the last part a little as if it were obvious, but it only made her nudge my shoulder with hers. And just like that, she and I were two teenagers giggling and talking about boys.

"He wrote you handwritten letters or typed letters? Because there really is a difference Belly." Taylor said adjusting her sunglasses on top of her head.

"Handwritten ones." I corrected her.

"Oh my God, Belly that is so romantic, no wonder you took him back so easily. How is Jere taking it?" She asked.

"Jere is okay. He wasn't at first, but I think he now realizes that he can't do anything to change what me and Conrad do." I said and hearing myself say, _what me and Conrad do,_ had given me chill bumps.

"True, I can't believe this Belly. This is major. I am happy for you. Just as long as he is nice." She added the last part to be her protective self.

"He has been great, I promise." I said squeezing her hand.

"So are you excited about the art festival?" I asked her.

"Of course, but let's get back in time so that I can catch up with you in the tanning department."

"Sure." I said beaming. My best friend was here at the summer house. This was going to be an amazing summer.

There was one summer when I was seven, before I had liked any boys, and more specifically Conrad; that Susannah, mom and us kids went to the very same art festival. Susannah wanted to buy me a dream catcher that had sea shells strung through it with wind chimes at the bottom. Mom said I didn't need it because there was nowhere that I could hang it and enjoy it.

"Yeah I can mom. I can hang it in my window at the beach house. With one of those suction cup things that can stick to the window. Like the thermometer daddy has on the back kitchen window at home." I said whining and explaining like seven-year-olds do.

"Come on Laur, it would be perfect for her!" Susannah said turning back to make sure she could still see Jeremiah. He used to have to walked around on baby leashes because he would walk off without anybody knowing. This was the first summer the kid-leash didn't come with us. Conrad and Steven would make fun of him and so Susannah let him off the leash under the condition that if he went off on his own, that she would make him wear it as punishment.

Even that day he was pushing his luck. Conrad must have heard me whining because he came up to investigate. This made the other boys come around to see too. This was the age that we all pointed out when the other was getting in trouble, and my whining was always a good sign of that.

"Belly is whining, I bet she is in so much trouble." Steven said making an ugly face to patronize me.

"I am not! I am not Steven!" I said stomping my foot and glaring over at him.

"Steven mind your own business. Belly is just talking to me." Mom said in her calm way.

"No, I heard her whining voice." Steven said grinning at me.

I stuck my tongue out at him and turned to mom.

"But mom, that wind chime-dreamcatcher was made for me, even Susannah said so." I said

"Whiner, Whiner!" Steven chanted and Jeremiah chimed in, like any youngest boy would.

I ended up not getting the wind chime or anything that day because I punched Steven in the nose.

"Belly?" Conrad said poking me in the arm as we walked hand in hand through the art festival.

"Sorry, I was just thinking." I said smiling at him.

"About what?" He asked as a little girl with face paint ran in between us and under our held hands. We had to lift them to prevent from clothes-lining her. I giggled at her. She looked like a little fairy princess.

"I was thinking about when we came here with our moms ages ago." I said.

"Oh the day you punched Steven in the go-nats?" he asked.

"No I punched him in the nose." I corrected him.

"No, trust me it was the nats. You got in so much trouble. You were grounded from going down to the beach for two whole days until your mom got tired of you whining so she let you go." Conrad said laughing at me.

"Geez. I remember him deserving it though." I said laughing.

Conrad laughed and shook his head.

"What was he making fun of you for again, that provoked your wrath?" he asked.

"It was because your mom wanted to buy me a dream-catcher and mom wouldn't let me have it so I was negotiating with her. I guess I was whining a little bit." I said smiling.

"Ha! You whining? Never." Conrad said throwing his head back and really laughing.

"Yeah well, I got my way a lot didn't I?" I said. He stopped and pulled me to him.

"Of course you did." He said pulling me to him and kissing me in the middle of a graveled path in between tented stands.

"Ew!" A little boy passing by said. His face was painted like a tiger.

"Steven!" The little boy's mom scolded him.

Me and Conrad looked at each other and busted out laughing.

Conrad then looked around as if he had an idea.

"What?" I asked.

"I know it has been a long time, but do you want to see if we can find you a dream catcher?" Conrad asked. I mean my mom wanted to get you one, so you need one." Conrad said pulling me with him.

He was a man on a mission. We walked up and down isles and isles of booths with paintings with jewelry and other cool knic-knacks.

We passed mom and Taylor in a booth with peculiar lamps and other things, but he pulled me along before I could say hello.

Finally, he found what he was looking for and I bumped into him before I could stop. The lady was familiar, because she was the very same one that ran this booth fourteen years ago. There were bigger dreamcatcher-wind chimes than she had made before, but then my eyes set on a smaller one with beautiful crystal shells as the chimes. Conrad saw where my eyes went and spoke to the lady.

"Hello, beautiful pieces you have here. How much for that one?" Conrad asked pointing to the one I was eyeing.

"It will be thirty dollars." The little lady said smiling at me as if she remembered me. Surely not.

The thought was a little embarrassing.

Conrad dug into his back pocket and pulled out two twenties and handed them to the lady. I moved forward to protest, but he wouldn't have it.

"No, let me get this for you, for my mom." He said raising his hand to brush my cheek softly. I shivered under his touch and nodded.

The little lady gave him a ten back and smiled over at me.

"Enjoy it." She said zipping up her bank bag and stuffing it back under the lawn chair she was sitting on, sitting on the bag itself.

As soon as we were out of view I held it out in front of me beaming.

"Con, I love it." I said touching the real shells in the yarn and touching the crystal shells that acted as the chimes.

This one was even better than the one Susannah wanted to get me.

"I feel like I remember that day now. You were so mad at your mom on the car ride home. I remember her saying to you, "Good girls get presents, not bad girls who punch their brother's privates." He started laughing at seven-year-old me's misfortune, but it was wonderful that he remembered. He remembered everything.

"Yeah, yeah well like I said earlier, he deserved it." I said trying to sound smug.

We reunited with mom and Taylor and I showed them what Conrad had gotten for me.

"Isn't that the same thing Beck wanted to get you a long time ago?" Mom asked not skipping a step.

"Sure is." I said smiling at her. Mom just laughed.

"You got it after all." She said with her eyes glittering with tears.

"After Beck died I felt guilty for not letting you have everything she wanted to give you for you to remember her by." My mom said standing tall to try and compose herself.

"Mom would have spoiled Belly rotten, and you know it." Conrad said to make my mom feel better.

"She surely would have." Mom agreed.

Back at the house Taylor was down by the pool talking to her boyfriend on her cell phone. Her voice carrying up to my bedroom window where I could hear her asking him what he had done today.

Conrad was helping me hang my gift in the window like I had planned to so long ago. He was standing behind me and I could feel the warmth coming off of his chest as he fiddled with the suction cup sticky we had stopped at a hardware store to buy on our way home.

Once he hung it to his satisfaction he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into his chest further.

"It looks like it was made to go there." He said into my ear. It made me tickle, so I giggled.

"It really does." I agreed turning around to face him,

"You are something else, Conrad Fisher." I said putting my arms around his neck.

He kept his hands on my waist.

"Well I could just about say the same thing about you Belly Conklin." He said swaying us. The wind chimes finally playing their song in the breeze.

"Thank you for today." I said and kissed him on the cheek.

He pulled me closer to him.

"Thank you for every day you have given me this summer." He said pulling back so he could see my face.

"Even the awkward days when you were doing a terrible job avoiding me to pacify Jere." He said laughing at me.

"Hey, I played it pretty cool – at least I think so." I said swatting at his chest.

He caught my feeble weapons with his hands and brought them to his mouth to kiss them.

"Would it scare you for me to tell you how much I love you?" He asked. Hiding his mouth behind my hands in his.

"Of course not." I said. "I love you too Conrad." I said with my heart rate rising to an unhealthy level.

"I mean… because Belly, I love you so, so much. You are everything." He said pulling me to him again. His eyes soft and such a deep blue.

"You are everything." I whispered as we closed the little remaining distance and kissed. He was gentle, yet strong and his slow movements did something to my body that nobody else had ever been able to do. It set me on fire. I could only be on fire for him, and only him. I found it unimaginable that either of us had ever belonged to anybody else.

"Belly?" He said between kisses.

"Yes?" I breathed. Unable to do anything other than want to kiss him more. It was a treasure and a luxury.

"I can love you how you deserve now. We can do this. I will come and see you every chance I can get this year. I will make this work." He said pulling me back to him and we kissed for who knows how long.

I grabbed the back of his head to pull him gently back by his hair and whispering into his lips. " _ **We**_ will make this work." I whispered emphatically.

That afternoon all of us stayed on the beach until the sunset. Me, mom, Taylor, Steven, and Conrad spent the afternoon on the beach. It was carefree and effortless. We had brought down the old CD player with an antenna down to the beach and played the local radio station that played a mixed genre of music with a low enough volume to maintain easy conversation.

Conrad and Steven had been tossing a football. Steven tried to teach Taylor how to throw a spiral, although, I already knew that she knew how to because a lot of boys had used that to flirt with her in the past. It was funny though that Steven thought he was such a player. He loved the attention. Maybe his confidence is how he scored Katie.

I was sitting on a beach lounger next to mom just at the edge of the water to wear the upcoming tide rushed up and drown my feet. Beach sand was the best pedicure.

"We should throw a party." Steven said to Conrad.

"The last time we threw a party here Belly acted like a crazy person." Conrad said throwing the football back in Steven's direction.

"Hey!" I hollered.

"Old women don't condone beach house parties, nor do they attend them." Mom said flipping through a catalog for stationary.

"C'mon mom you aren't that old." Steven said running over to her to squat near her chair and pinch her shoulder. I sniffed the air like I smelled something stinky, so he flicked my shoulder.

"I am going to a conference next weekend so you guys can throw it then. Just don't break the house." Mom said with a straight face that made me chuckle.

"Awesome. Con! Did you hear that?" Steven asked hopping up.

"Yeah I heard." Conrad said with sarcasm in his voice.

In the quiet evening we heard a car coming down our road. It was impossible not to hear the roar of the engine of Jeremiah's new car.

"Oh, Jeremiah is back." Mom said getting up and folding her chair.

"I will head up to greet him. What are you kids wanting for dinner tonight?" My mom asked.

"I thought maybe I would grill for us tonight." Conrad said and then added, "You are here to enjoy yourself Laur.

Mom smiled and patted his shoulder as she trekked up the dry sand towards the house.

"A doctor and a chef?" I asked standing up to go and flirt with my man. He appreciated the effort because he blushed and closed the distance between us with two quick strides.

"You like that?" He asked.

"Oh yeah." I nodded and gave him a sardonic smile.

Creedence Clearwater Revival's "Have You Ever Seen The Rain?" came on the radio and I shouted at Steven to turn it up. He didn't, but Taylor did. She started dancing snapping her perfect little fingers and bobbing her head. Conrad swung me around so quickly it made me laugh and he moved with me in a sweet little dance, thank goodness he led because he knew I had two left feet or knew that I didn't normally dance without a lead.

He had a way of looking at me that made me feel singular. It made me feel safe and at one with myself. It was a peaceful feeling. The thing that I loved the most was that the butterflies still wracked around in my belly just by his proximity, so when he looked at me I felt hammeringly alive. That is something that not everyone can say about their significant other.

We danced through the whole song and Steven thought he was funny to make the comment that we would all see the rain this weekend and all of us would be stuck inside-bored and staring at each other, but we ignored him. He thought he was so funny.

"Didn't think to invite us to the party?" Jeremiah asked with humor in his voice.

"That isn't until next weekend." Steven said wiggling his eyebrows.

As he approached with Melanie trailing behind him we noticed he brought a box of beers with him and Melanie carried a six pack of Mike's hard lemonade for us girls.

"Then we will bring the party down to the beach." Jeremiah said raising the box over his head.

"Cool." Conrad said with me still in his arms. Jeremiah didn't act strange or flinch when he saw us, it was like he had prepared himself for it. I was glad he was making an effort too. Maybe Melanie had encouraged Jere's relationship with Conrad like I suggested.

"Yeah." Jeremiah said to Conrad as he dropped the box and opened it and tossed his big brother a beer.

That night we all enjoyed time outside. We all swam in the pool, while Conrad grilled burgers and hot dogs. We played chicken and Steven refused to be on my team, so when it was up to me using Jere as a partner I passed and suggested Melanie have a go at it. Conrad was the only boy who I would team up with in chicken.

Jeremiah didn't seem offended and he encouraged Melanie to hop up on his shoulders.

"Get up here babe." He said patting his shoulders. She leaped and climbed up him like a little athletic monkey.

Conrad was not only the chef, but the DJ and he played music for us to chill to. There was nothing that good music could not do to make everyone get along. It was hard not to when the music set a great mood.

I hopped out of the pool, which seemed like a warm hot tub compared to the damp air that the incoming storm had conjured. I froze as I shuffled over to my towel and wrapped myself up in it. It was nothing compared to how cold I knew it was going to be when I went into the air conditioned kitchen to get my Kool-Aid.

As I began wrapping myself into the oversized towel I had been using all day I caught Conrad checking me out in my bikini. I wrapped myself up and looked at him with an accusatory glare and walked over to him because I was drawn to him AND because the grill had to be warm from how Conrad looked a little sweaty slaving over it.

"Like what you see?" I ask him.

"Of course I do." He said not flinching.

"Me too." I said stepping against him. He cherishing my cold skin and me cherishing his warm and dry tank top and sexy muscles that filled it.

That night dinner was fun. It was the first relaxed night, and to think Jeremiah and Melanie were here and they were really fun and pleasant. Taylor and Melanie exchanged blond girl secrets and chatted about how pretty each of them thought the other was. They talked about how unfair it was that they hadn't met at school this past year.

The boys bantered about sports and they teased Conrad for how he belonged in a kitchen. Conrad laughed and shook his head as he took sips of his beer. I could tell how happy he was to have his brother and Steven there with him like old times. He caught me staring at him from the other end of the table where I sat with the girls. He at one end, and me at the other of the rectangle outdoor table.

I winked at him, and he smiled because he knew I was telling him that I told him so, about Jeremiah.

Mom sat in the middle of the table taking inn all of the conversation and then excused herself as the boys had just piled on their second helping of burgers. It had to be hard to be the only adult. I am sure all of us young people were making her miss how young her best friend use to made her feel. I watched her disappear through the sliding glass door. I looked over at Steven who took the time to notice too. I gave it a moment and when she didn't come back out I went to find her.

As I began to open the sliding glass door, my hand wrapping around the handle I heard my mom giggling through the screened window that someone must have opened sometime that day.

"I miss you." Mom said like a little school girl.

"I will see you next weekend." She said after a few seconds.

"Oh yeah the kids are having a blast and everyone is getting along well, which you know I was worried wouldn't happen." Mom said.

As I listened to this side of the conversation I turned back around and walked back over to the table. Steven was back to doing his own thing. No longer worrying over mom since he thought I would handle it. Jeremiah and Conrad both looked over at me as I sat back down. I just shrugged and excused myself to the pool. Who cares that I would get a stomach cramp from swimming with a full stomach. I think my mom had a secret boyfriend, and the fact that it was a secret made me uncomfortable.

It made me more uncomfortable than it should.

If he was a secret, then what the hell was wrong with him?

 ***THANK YOU FOR READING* THANK YOU FOR THE FOLLOWS AND REVIEWS THAT I HAVE GOTTEN SO FAR. I AM READING THEM! THANK YOU FOR THE KIND WORDS.**

~I will update every week so check back then for more of the story! XOXO SheSwann~


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

My mom has a boyfriend, at least, I think she does. I wanted to tell Steven but I didn't think he would believe me. Why shouldn't he, though? Our mom is beautiful. Yes, she dresses a little mute and conservative, but she is an intelligent woman and dresses like one.

Most people say that I look like my dad. I wouldn't hate to look like my mother, though. She is tall, elegant, she has brown hair that is cut to her shoulders and she pulls it back from her face with broaches in a half-up-half-down hairstyle. It is her signature look. Around the house, she wears it in a messy bun at the back of her head with a cool headband that acts as a bandana. My mom is fit, walks every day, and eats well. It was hard not to see how beautiful that she was as I looked at her as closely as I had the past couple of days as I waited to catch her talking to whoever it was again and hoping that she would give away information. But, is this person good enough for my mom? It is hard to imagine that any man is good enough for her. It is also surprising that she gave them the time of day.

I decided to go down to the rec room to flip on a movie. The weather was still pouring rain and high winds. The weather man only said through the weekend. It was Monday night and the weather was still awful. What a rotten liar.

Jeremiah and Melanie left for Boston yesterday after lunch promising that they would return for Steven's declared party on Saturday. I often wondered if Melanie's parents cared that she was following Jere around all summer. I doubted they cared. She didn't seem to talk about it if they did mind. Taylor went back home too. Just for the week. Her mom needed her to go with her to her breast implant surgery with her, and stay with her for the aftercare. She was very dramatic about it. She was paying for it from alimony from her and her husbands divorce. Taylor's dad began dating a girl about five years older than Taylor herself and her mom went on a rampage. She got a new haircut, wardrobe, and now new breasts. Taylor thought it was a little dramatic, but she was in full support of her mother and currently not talking to her father.

Conrad drove Steven to see Katie and they were all going to go to a casino to gamble, something that wasn't my scene. I suggested to Conrad that he should go with Steven so that he wouldn't feel like Conrad was alienating him this summer. He kind of had been since we started our relationship back up.

I received a text from Con around 8:40.

 **Conrad: I really want to come back. Do you think they can take a cab back to the house?**

I was thoughtful for a moment. Wishing that he could come back and keep me company, but I knew being selfish was not attractive.

 **Me: No that would hurt Steven's feelings. Not that I care. I just don't want you to lose a friend.**

Yeah, I am looking out for you Conrad. He didn't take long to respond.

 **Conrad: Yeah, I know it would. You should have come.**

Ha! Come and join you? With what money? I typed out a quick response.

 **Me: No way. Don't have any money to gamble away anyways.**

Who did he think I was? The queen of England? Again, he was quick with his response.

 **Conrad: They have penny machines…**

I could almost hear the sarcasm through the words. But, in my defense, I didn't know what those were.

 **Me: I don't know what that is…**

Take that! I thought. I decided to watch Great Expectations on Netflix. I found it to be casting genius to cast the lead actors kid brother to play the lead actors younger self in the movie. I loved the movie because of that, among other things. My phone buzzed, alerting me that I had a new message.

 **Conrad: A slot machine that allows you to gamble with pennies.**

I didn't need to know encyclopedia boy. Context clues were enough. I had just meant that I didn't know how they worked. Although it sounds interesting. I wonder what makes that a fun game to play? Maybe the low stakes aspect of it? If you lose, it isn't a big deal. Wait, penny machine, who carries around pennies.? I type out my thoughts and push send.

 **Me: Oh, well I don't have many of those either. Who carries around change these days?**

The movie started to play and I got excited, jigging in my pajamas as I stuff a hand full of popcorn into my mouth, and when I do I am thankful that there is nobody around to witness my pig-like behavior. Another buzz.

 **Conrad: I do.**

I rolled my eyes at his response. That is probably what he is playing on.

 **Me: Of course you do**.

I wait for his response to my sarcasm. I could see the ironic smile playing at his lips as if I said it to him in person.

 **Conrad: Just watch me. I will make like thirty dollars and it will buy us breakfast at Denny's and putt-putt.**

 **Me: I will believe it when I see it. Gotta go. Watching Great Expectations. It needs my full attention.**

 **Conrad: RUDE.**

 **Me: Blowing kiss emoji**

 **Conrad: emoji with no mouth bag of money emoji**

I laughed at his choices of emoticons. Of course, he could find a way to be cute through texting. I put my phone down and stuffed another handful of movie theater popcorn into my mouth.

I really need to get a job while I am here. I really am broke. I will need money for when school starts back up. My senior year. In just one year I will be allowed to be a child and family therapist. My optimism will hopefully do me well in my new found job.

As the movie started I heard my mom coming down the stairs.

"Hey bean, whatcha watching?" Mom asked, calling me by my favorite nickname.

"Great Expectations. Have you ever seen it?" I asked her.

She had her hair pulled back in a fun braid and I analyzed her as she responded.

"No, is it good?" She asked.

"Yeah, it is," I responded.

We watched the movie in silence, just me and her.

"Mom?" I said towards the end.

"Yeah, bean?" Mom asked, her eyes still fixed on the screen.

"What do you do when me and Steven are in school?" I asked. She turned to me and looked surprised.

"Why do you ask?" She asked me with her interest piqued, but she kept her eyes on the movie. I smiled my nonchalant smile.

"Because I worry about you being lonely," I responded truthfully. I didn't want to outright ask her about a boyfriend. I would hope she would just tell me. My mom is a private person, though.

Mom smiled and rolled her eyes.

"Oh Belly, you shouldn't worry about old women. I have lots of clubs that I am in and I have my job of course. It keeps me busy," she responded. She always knew what to say. But, I felt like she was being a little evasive.

"Who do you hang out with?" I asked prying a little bit further.

Mom looked thoughtful for a moment not turning my way.

"Well, I hang out with Ellen from my book club. I also see Tonya, you know from your high school PTO, um… Connor's mom. She and I sometimes get brunch. I don't know Belly. I do see people." She responded to me humored and a little exasperated by my questions.

I decide to push a little further.

"Do you ever date?" I asked.

She turned on me with her full attention.

"Why?" She sounded more distant.

"Because you are single and beautiful! Why wouldn't you?" I said almost shrugging back into the couch cushions. She still pins me with a curious and authoritative look.

"Belly." Mom said trailing off. Hopefully, she will just admit it to me. Admit it! Admit it mom!

"Mom," I said encouraging her.

"I have a male friend. We are _friends_. We go out." Mom said looking back at the TV hoping that I would leave it alone. She should know better.

"Mom!" I shouted. Do I know him?" I asked turning on the couch sitting Indian style on the couch facing her.

"No you don't know him I met him right after Susannah died. I met him at the airport on my way to Turkey." Mom said taking some of my popcorn and putting it into her mouth. It wouldn't take her long to finish the small kernel before she would have to answer my next question.

"What is his name? And why do I not know about him? Oh, how romantic!" I asked. I could tell she was unsure of what to tell me.

She rolled her eyes at me.

"Well first off. You nor Steven have never asked. Second his name is Samuel."

True. Neither of us has ever taken an interest in my mom's personal life. We'd always been chasing around our own interests, never really looking out for mom. The thought made me feel guilty and sad.

"What is he like?" I asked.

Mom figured out that I wasn't going to let up so she turned and sat Indian style facing me as well.

"Well, he is quiet and intelligent. He is a world traveler and a renowned author. He has hiked to the top Mt. Everest. He is an instructor at Cambridge in word studies and he has tenor there and he also wrote a few textbooks on women's studies. He is quite the well-rounded man. He builds furniture as a hobby." And as my mom kept listing off all of the wonderful qualities. She made him sound like the most amazing man and the most amazing match for her. I couldn't believe it. She told me about how he lives in London most of the year and flies back to the States on summer break. He travels home to see his mom who is 96 and he travels to ruins and deep and mysterious places just so that he can just see them.

"I would love to meet him," I said truthfully.

Mom shook her head and began to get up.

"No Belly, it isn't anything serious. He is just someone that I can talk to and spend time with every now and again." Mom said heading towards the stairs.

"Mom you like teachers." I pointed out because my dad was a college professor, hence, his grad student girlfriend that is no longer in grad school. They lived together now and I wondered where that was going too. And now she had been dating or seeing Samuel every now and again for the past six years. It sounded kind of serious to me.

Mom rolled her eyes and laughed.

"Good night Belly."

"Good night mom."

She only just thought the conversation was over.

I decided to watch another movie until the boys came home. I decided on the film version of Pride and Prejudice, the Keira Knightly version. I dimmed the lights further in the room and snuggled under my favorite woven blanket as the A/C kicked back on and it was positioned straight overhead.

The house was quiet except for the movie. Mom had gone to bed and it was 11:30 then I heard footsteps creaking from the floor above. I sent a quick text to Conrad.

 **Me: Hey are you guys home?**

I had to wait a few minutes before he got back to me. The footsteps grew heavier overhead.

 **Conrad: No Steven is wasted and so is Katie. I am Conrad the babysitter. I am trying to round them up now. Why?**

Upon seeing his text message my heart stopped. I heard too heavy of footsteps of them belong to my mom thumping down the stairs. I paused my movie and so that I could hide behind the couch. I fixed my eyes on one spot so that I could picture were the intruder was with my eyes just from the sound of how far away they were. My heart thudded in my chest and I feared the person coming down the stairs would hear it, and I tried to stop breathing so they wouldn't hear that either. But my heart was beating so fast that I could only pant.

My phone buzzed. My heart stopped. I looked down at it like a traitor. Jeremiah's head popped around the couch.

"Belly?"

"Oh, my gosh Jeremiah!" I said popping up and clinging a hand to my chest.

"What are you doing Belly?" He asked with humor.

"I was watching a movie before you started creeping around the house," I said angrily with him for scaring me.

I looked down to Conrad's text.

 **Conrad: Is everything okay Belly?**

I quickly responded.

 **Me: . . . I heard footsteps upstairs and mom's gone to bed. emoji smacking face in horror it was only Jeremiah. Thank goodness. I was so scared.**

"Sorry, I had to let Conrad know I was still alive," I said to Jeremiah as I plopped back onto the couch to get under the blanket. All the terror had frozen me down to my bones.

"You are still as nutty as ever Belly." He said dragging his feet over to the couch to sit on the far end.

"What are you doing back?" I asked.

"Dad is letting me have the rest of the summer off. He said he wants me to enjoy my last summer of freedom." Jeremiah explained as if it were funny to him.

"Well, that was nice of him. Why didn't he just leave you alone to begin with? I asked him.

"I guess I was a little distracted while I had been there. He got mad at me one day for distracting the office with paper football. We made a field goal and everything." He said shrugging with humor in his eyes.

"Oh well. I guess you were momentarily fired. Where is Melanie?" I asked.

He looked over at me suddenly and with a funny pointed look.

"What?" I asked laughing at him.

"Melanie is gone." He said propping his feet up on the coffee table.

My phoned buzzed and I ignored it so that I wouldn't be rude to Jeremiah.

"What do you mean she is gone? Did you murder her?" I asked laughing.

"No, she is in Florida with her family. That is where she is from. I don't think that she and I are going to work out." He said running his hand through his hair. He looked tired.

"Bad breakup?" I asked.

"I've had worse." He said dryly. Then he smiled and said. "Yeah, she started crying when I suggested we take a break. I don't do the long distance thing." Jeremiah smiled like he was cool.

"Uh-huh, alright cool guy. Well, at least, you are a man who knows what they want." I said taking a sip of my canned cherry Coke.

"Share," Jeremiah said reaching for my drink.

I eyed him suspiciously. "Get your own," I said keeping it from him.

"Belly I have been driving for what feels like all day," Jeremiah whined.

"Quit your blubbering, Fisher and go get your own Coke," I said taking a long sip of my drink.

"You are not a nice girl." He said getting up and running up the stairs. I grinned in victory and hollered, "Get me another one while you are at it!" I giggled and put the movie back on. It hadn't gotten far. Elizabeth was still walking with her book back towards her family's home only about thirty seconds in.

I heard Jeremiah come back down the stairs.

He had two cokes, Twizzlers, and a freshly popped bowl of popcorn.

"Alright!" I said taking the popcorn from him so that he could settle in beside me.

"What are we watching Belles?" Jeremiah asked looking at me from the corner of his eye.

"Pride and Prejudice," I said in a whisper. He needed to quiet down if he wanted to hang out with me.

"Didn't you just read the book the beginning of the summer?" he asked.

I looked over at him.

"Yeah I did." His eyes lingered on mine and I broke the look and continued watching the movie.

I checked my phone at my side now that we were settled into watching the movie.

 **Conrad: What is he doing back?**

I typed out a response.

 **Me: Your dad gave him the rest of the summer off. We are watching a movie downstairs. Join us when you get home.**

"Tell me something to get my mind off of Melanie and the awful breakup," Jeremiah said drawing my eyes away from my phone.

I thought for a moment.

"My mom has had, like, a guy friend for six years. His name is Samuel." I said finally glad to share the information with someone.

"A guy friend?" Jeremiah said outraged. A surprised smile spread across his face.

"Yeah, I know. He is a professor at Cambridge." I said wiggling my eyebrows.

"Let's look him up," Jeremiah said. He got up and ran back up the stairs – to get his laptop I assumed.

When he came back down he did a hilarious dance like in Willy Wonka when they go up and down the stairs in a little jig in the room with the meadow made of candy. We used to call this dance the, "Downstairs tease".

"Get your butt over here and let's snoop," I said bossing him around. He lifted the laptop over his head and ran my way. He always knew how to make me laugh.

He plopped back onto the couch and flipped open his laptop. I scooted closer so that I could see. All his movements made me bounce around on the couch too.

"Where to Harriet the Spy?" Jeremiah said, referring to the summer that I followed the boys around journaling about what they did.

I busted out laughing.

"I still have those journals in my room." I said looking at him as humor spread across his face.

"You were a little weirdo." Jere said making fun of me.

"Hey, I was bored. You guys always left me out." I said then I added. "Let's look on the Universities website." I said waiting for him to pull up the website.

While he typed he said, "I didn't always leave you out."

"I know you didn't." I agreed.

Jeremiah pulled up the website and look through the program profiles.

"What does he teach?" Jeremiah asked.

"World History." I said humming with impatience. I was also glad that I had remembered the detail.

Jeremiah found the link and we both saw the name Dr. Sameul B. Killian III

"He is the third." Jeremiah said laughing.

"Click on his name!" I scolded him.

"You seriously need to calm down. How much sugar have you had?" Jeremiah said clicking on his name.

Samuel B. Killian III was pale with black hair and greenish blue eyes. He had a rough beard and brushed back hair. He looked like he was Greek or Italian. There was a link with a video.

"Click the video." I said eager for more information. And we waited for the video to buffer.

"Hello my name is Dr. Samuel Killian and I teach world history here at Cambridge University. In my class you will learn everything from the Mayan Empire to the fairy legends in Scotland. I want you to all open your minds to wonders of history. If you take my class you will be pushed to your full potential, but you will also learn about the greatest wonders of the world and maybe it will inspire you to visit these places." He continues to talk about his office hours and prime times to take his class.

"He has a badass accent." Jeremiah said looking over at me.

"He seems awesome, and he likes my mom. My mom! How cool is that." I said with wonder and excitement.

"You should invite him to the beach house." Jere suggested. "Look Belly, here is his email." Jeremiah added.

"Mom would kill me." I said it, but I was also considering Jeremiah's idea to be a good one. Mom wouldn't be lonely if he came.

We heard the others arrive upstairs.

"They're back." I said to Jeremiah.

"Where did they go anyways?" He asked.

"Oh, they went to the Casino." I said sticking my tongue out like the idea sounded gross, although, I didn't really care that much about it.

Conrad came down looking disheveled.

"Hey guys." Conrad said with exhaust in his voice.

"Hey." I said cheerfully from the couch. I hopped over to give him a hug.

He captured me in his arms and held me close. I could feel his nose in my hair.

"Bad night?" Jeremiah asked.

"You know how Steve gets when he is intoxicated with a girl." Conrad said to Jeremiah.

"Ew, guys let's not talk about that." I said wrinkling my nose.

"Oh my gosh, Conrad look, this is mom's boyfriend." I said bringing him by his hand towards the laptop that sat it Jere's lap.

"Samuel?" Conrad asked before he saw the laptop.

"You knew?" I asked baffled. How did he know?

"Yeah I have known for like four years." Conrad said, surprised we didn't know. His eyes darting between me and Jere.

"Why didn't you tell me!" I scolded him. He found my surprise to be humorous and pulled me back towards him.

"I thought you knew. Laurel is more private than I thought. I mean your mom didn't outright tell me. I met him once when I came to take her to lunch a while back. Samuel was getting into a cab and heading back towards the airport." Conrad explained.

"No mom didn't tell me. I mean once I asked she did." I thought out loud.

"Well isn't it great that she has somebody?" Conrad asked. I frowned.

"Yes it is. I just want to meet him. Don't you think I have a right to meet the man my mom has been seeing for so long?" I asked.

"I think so." Jeremiah said from the couch behind me.

I turned and gave him a grateful smile.

Conrad grabbed both of my hands.

"I think you should get to meet him too Belly. But maybe that is something that you should talk to your mom about. You know how she is." Conrad said as if he knew my mom better than me. Which, maybe he did in his own way. But I was her daughter who was the next generation of her, at least genetically – so I was entitled to some type of support in this, without going to my mom who would say no.

"Yeah, but she will say no," I said.

"Dang right, she will say no." Jeremiah chimed in behind me again.

Conrad seemed annoyed with the both of us.

"What are you going to do Belly? Invite him here without your mom's permission?" Conrad asked as if the idea was insane.

"Actually yes," I said crossing my arms.

Conrad ran his hand through his hair again. It looked wild and unruly. I wanted to run my own hands through it, but maybe not in front of Jeremiah.

"Belly…" Conrad started until Jeremiah cut him off.

"If our dad was dating someone for that long I would want to meet her too," Jeremiah said putting his two cents in.

Conrad glared over at his younger brother.

"Belly let's go talk about this upstairs. If you really want to meet him, I will talk to Laurel with you." He said rubbing my hands.

"Okay," I said leaving Jeremiah behind to finish the movie and snacks on his own.

The next morning Conrad had helped me fix a good and nutritious breakfast for mom so that we could breach the subject of inviting Samuel to Cousins. Mom had done this for Mr. Fisher when she wanted to get her way a long time ago. I thought that maybe I could try this with her to get my own way. Steven had left early this morning to take Katie home so he couldn't come along with my plan. Steven still didn't know about mom's boyfriend and as long as he was staying occupied in his own world, I assumed it wasn't a high priority for him to know about it.

"What do you think she will say?" I asked Conrad.

"Honestly?" He asked me.

"Yes," I said fearing what he would say.

"I don't think she will go for it." He replied pushing my hair behind my ear.

"Why not?" I asked pouting a little bit.

"Because your mom is not the typical woman. She doesn't gush about her relationships. She never even gushes about any of the success she has at work. I mean have you heard her brag or flaunt anything, ever?"

Conrad had a good point. Mom was so reserved. I felt that she was almost too reserved. I would love to show Conrad off to anybody. I would love to walk hand in hand with him back in my home town so all of the girls that used to hear about me having a crush on a mysterious summer boy could see that I was finally with him after all of this time. I knew it was juvenile, but he did leave me at my junior prom, which prompted a lot of questions.

"Well, we will never know unless we ask," I said squeezing a grapefruit to make her juice. Conrad just gave me a reassuring smile.

Mom sauntered into the kitchen five minutes later with a big sun hat on. She had been outside where she had started growing herbs for cooking. Mom had really gotten into natural herbs and natural oils.

She was taking her gardening gloves off in the mud room and slipped out of her crocs and sauntered over to the kitchen sink to wash her hands.

"Is this homemade oatmeal?" Mom asked smelling the fruity oatmeal that I had prepared for her.

"Yes, would you like some?" I asked her already piling some into a bowl.

"And freshly squeezed grapefruit juice," I added placing the bowl on the breakfast bar in front of her and running over to pour her a glass of grapefruit juice.

"Connie, are you teaching Belly to be healthier?" Mom asked as she tried a bite of her oatmeal.

Conrad stifled a laugh that didn't go unnoticed by me.

I gave him my, you're in trouble look.

"Yeah I am actually Laur. I hope to instill some good habits before summer is out." Conrad said loving the joke that mom was unaware of.

"So mom," I said glaring over in my boyfriend's direction and changing my face into my super sweet baby Belly face.

"Yeah, Bean?" Mom asked eyes cast down at her oatmeal.

"So I was… no, we were wondering." I looked up at Conrad and tweaked my head to the side in a malicious grin and turned back to mom. "We were wondering if you would invite Samuel to the summer house so that we could all meet him," I asked, my breathing pausing as I awaited my mother's answer.

Mom looked up and me and slowly over to Conrad. Then back to me.

"I don't think that is a good idea." Mom said as she begun to stand up.

"No, wait, why?" I asked hurriedly.

"Because Belly our relationship isn't like that. I can't just ask him to fly across the country to come see me for a weekend." Mom scolded me.

"Why not? If he is your boyfriend that shouldn't be a big deal." I said back defiantly.

Mom got up this time and Conrad put a hand on my shoulder. It was to make me not follow her and to comfort me at the same time.

I stormed off in pursuit of the patio and ran out onto the beach. I stared out at the waves, angry at my mom for being so closed off. She hasn't changed at all. She is just as closed off as I remember. She only wants to do things that take any attention off of her. Conrad didn't follow me and I was thankful for it. I knew that I could possible snap at him in my bad mood. I sat own in the sand and listened to the ocean for a little while longer.

I heard someone approaching me and didn't turn to welcome them. It was Jeremiah.

"So your plan didn't go well?" Jeremiah asked.

I looked over at him with a plain pout on my face, but I didn't care.

"No," I said turning back to the ocean.

"Well, that's okay because I emailed him last night and he said he would be here next weekend," Jeremiah said quirking a cute smile my direction.

"No, you didn't!" I asked excited and impressed by his fearlessness.

"You bet I did. This way if your mom gets mad she can just get mad at me." Jeremiah said dancing with his shoulders making me laugh.

"You are crazy!" I said laughing some more. "Thank you, Jeremiah," I said pushing my now-long hair out of my face.

"You are welcome." He said with a grin to match mine.

I was so thankful to have my friend back. Someone that takes those crazy leaps for you and makes you do things you don't normally do. I knew Conrad would be mad at Jeremiah for this. But, to be honest I was thankful that he did. Not thankful for going behind my mom's back or anything, but to have someone give you something that you want in hopes that this will be good for my mom. I have seen how lonely she has been; she may need this without admitting it to herself.

"Does mom know yet. Like has he told her?" I asked Jere.

"He said he was going to," Jeremiah said grinning like he should have a handlebar mustache to twiddle.

"JEREMIAH!" My mom yelled from the house. We both turned around to see my mom power walking towards us in her oversized sun hat and Conrad stepping outside to see what the commotion was about.

"Uh-oh, you're in trouble," I said scooting away from him.

He just tossed his head back and laughed.

*THANK YOU FOR READING! CHECK BACK THIS WEEK FOR CHAPTER 7*****


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

I don't think that I have ever seen Jeremiah Fisher run as fast as he did when he ran from my angry mother, and better yet, heard him have such a girlish giggle as he did as he flicked up sand behind his heels as he ran away.

The whole action reminded me of when we were younger and Jeremiah would tease the seagulls with a single cheese puff. He would taunt the seagulls into chasing him as he ran around the beach with the cheese puff held over his head in a gesture that was giving to the seagulls. He would run around in circles with about twenty seagulls fluttering above him as he attempted at evading them. I remember it would make all of us kids laugh so hard we would cry.

He finally stopped doing that when he was eleven and about three of the seagulls pooped on him as he ran away. That was something all of us made fun of him for a good chunk of the summer.

"Jeremiah!" Mom yelled as he hauled off down the beach.

Mom pinned me with a look like we were cohorts on a mission to make her life harder.

"I swear he did it. It was not me. Conrad suggested we come to you and ask. Jeremiah went rogue on this one." I said raising my hands above my head.

Mom huffed out air and came to sit down beside me on the sand.

"So he is coming after all?" I asked grinning on the inside.

"Yes, he is." Mom said as she looked out into the ocean as if the idea surprised her.

"You seem surprised." I pointed out.

"I am surprised." Mom admitted.

Maybe it was a good thing after all that Jeremiah meddled.

"If that boy didn't remind me so much of Susannah I would… I would." And my mom started grinning, she couldn't keep her face straight as she laughed into the back of her hand.

"He is someone that you can't stay mad at for long." I said giggling.

"So much like Beck." Mom said shaking her head with an ironic grin.

"I am just glad that he is back to normal." I admitted.

Mom looked over at me and rubbed my shoulder.

"Yeah well, he missed you as a friend just as much as you missed him Belly." Mom said as she saw him walking back towards us. His grin showed no remorse.

"Things seem to be getting pretty serious with Conrad pretty fast." Mom said looking at me with exploration. As if something in my eyes gave my obsession of him away, more than ever, now that he was mine. I don't think that I could survive it if he turned cold on me again.

"Yeah. It is almost like we picked up from where we left off so long ago, and then some." I said as the tide started to rise up to my toes.

"Well, you are still on the pill aren't you Belly?" Mom asked from out of nowhere.

"Mom!" I scolded. Jeremiah was almost to us.

Mom gave me a no nonsense look.

"Geez! Yes! I am! Now, shh!" I said as Jeremiah approached with a beautiful grin.

"You know how to charm an old woman Jeremiah." Mom said crossing her arms. Her ironic grin back in full-fledged fashion.

"Well, you know I love you Laur." Jeremiah said crouching down to pull her into a hug.

"How did you charm Samuel by the way? He is coming from Canada to see me." My mom asked as she held on to Jeremiah's hand that rested over her shoulders. She fiddled with it playfully.

"I said, dear Mr. Killian the third, my name is Jeremiah Fisher. I am Laurel's best friend Susannah's son and I would like to formally invite you to my beach house in Cousins, so that you can see Laurel and meet Steven, Belly, myself and my less-handsome older brother Conrad." Jeremiah said making mom laugh.

"Something along the lines of that." Jeremiah added raising his eyebrows at me.

"Well whatever it was, I guess a thank you is in order." Mom said, which made me blanch. I thought she was going to uninvite Samuel.

"Well, I am glad you don't want to kill me Laurel." Jeremiah said pretending to wipe sweat from his brow.

"Not this time." Mom said cutting her eyes at him.

Today is the day of the party. Steven has been running around stringing lights around the privacy fence around the pool.

"Belly! Get Conrad to bring more extension cords out here!" Steven yelled at me like I was five hundred miles away.

"No. I won't because you are YELLING at me!" I shouted back making him jump.

He turned and glared at me and shook his head.

"Make yourself useful. We have an awesome party happening here in four hours." Steven said dismissing me with a wave.

"Who made you party-president? Jeremiah is the best at throwing parties anyway." I said tossing a grin over at a lounging-by-the-pool Jeremiah.

"That's right, girl!" Jeremiah purred in the voice that always made me laugh.

Conrad walked out and smiled when he saw me laughing. He was carrying the extension cord that Steven had demanded, so I assumed that he must have heard him. Although I think the astronauts in space could hear him.

"Yes! Alright we are going to have the coolest party ever. We should set up tents out here so people can stay the night." Steven said rubbing his hands together and observing his handy-work.

The party was in full swing. There were more people there than I could have ever thought possible. How are there so many people in Cousins that are around our age?

I was sitting on the couch chatting with Conrad when Nicole walked in the front door and immediately ran a nervous hand through her blond hair looking around the party. She smooths her lipstick with her pinky finger. I can tell she is looking for Conrad and I can't help but say,

"Your girlfriend is looking for you." Conrad looked at me confused and I nodded my head in her direction.

He looked back and me and gave me a look of sarcasm.

"Yeah, you are funny Belly." He said rubbing my leg that was hugged close to my chest on the couch.

"Conrad!" Nicole's voice sounded overly happy from behind me. He looked up with a panicked expression.

I mocked her and mouthed, "Conrad!" with enthusiasm. He smirked.

Nicole walked by to sit on the other side of Conrad.

"How are you?" She asked sitting like me but turning towards him. He was turned to me with his arm behind me on the couch. Facing me.

He responded to her with a smile I could hear, but I couldn't see his face.

He turned back to me with a funny expression on his face.

Nicole didn't leave. She stayed on the couch watching the two of us so much that we soon after got up and walked out towards the beach.

"I saw her out here on the second day talking to you." I said, feeling brave from my beverage.

"Yeah she was walking up this way. I don't know why. She never has." Conrad said taking my hand as we walked.

"I think it is obvious." I said brushing my hair away from my face. He cocked his eyebrow at me.

"She doesn't like me Belly. She only thinks she does." He said pulling me closer, releasing my hand and putting his arm over my shoulder, pulling me closer.

"That is probably what you said about me." I said, which shocked us both.

He stopped us in front of the life guard stand and started climbing up. Once he was positioned in the seat he reached a hand down for me.

We sat together on the chair and listened to the ocean for a few minutes.

"That isn't what I said about you." Conrad answered a few minutes later which surprised me. Conrad was a professional at not responding to things that I wanted him to. I had almost forgotten that I had said that.

"Well I remember that there was a time when my affections were not returned by you." I said wrapping my arms around my waist.

It was dark and the party roared on behind us. I was surprised that one of the neighbors hadn't complained. I could hear Conrad breathing, but I could barely see him. But I knew every curve of his face. It was just another example of how in love with him I was. I was so attuned to everything about him.

"That last summer my mom was here it was hard for me. You know? Like I knew something was up. I assumed it was just something with my dad at first, but then my mom started sleeping more and not getting dressed for the day. You know how much she liked to dress up. That was how it started off the first time she was sick. But regarding all of that, the last summer my mom was here the first time I saw you I am pretty sure time stopped a little bit. I mean I know that I have seen you before. I have helped you guys carrying in your bags for what feels like a thousand times. I was always happy to see you, but this time you were just… different."

"You told me how you felt and it was reciprocated and I was angry, angrier than I have ever been in my entire life. It made me angry that you were so sweet to me, even after I was so cold to you. You were also extremely obnoxious with your Cam Cameron. Where you with him to make me jealous?"

While I was obsessing over his whole "Time stopping" talk I was fortunate enough to catch his last sentence only it made me laugh before I could answer which probably made me look guilty.

"No I did not date Cam to make you jealous." I said laughing more for the effect than meaning to.

"Uh-huh I don't believe you." Conrad said looking down at me through mischievous eyes.

"I swear I wasn't. But if you would've asked me to be with you I would have dropped him like a hot potato." I said with as much truth in my words as I could manage.

"Well Belly Conklin, you flatter me." Conrad said with a funny voice, or rather, accent that I had never heard him use. It made me laugh at how bad it was.

"I used Nicole to make you jealous." Conrad laughed to hide his embarrassment at his truth.

This shocked me. Of all of the things in the world I would never have found this to be true.

"Don't believe me?" He asked, reading my expression.

"Not at all. You two were super convincing if you were." I said shaking my head in silent, calm outrage.

"Let's see… that day we were debating on watching a movie and you lied about wanting to watch the Titanic. It was so obvious to Nicole how intrigued I was with you that she asked me about it later."

"What did she ask you?" I asked like I was a dehydrated person in the desert asking for water. He loved that he had my interest.

"She asked me why I bothered with her if I wanted to be with you. I said, I don't want to start anything with you at that time, and that you were the real thing. It made her so mad she left and didn't call for a few days." He said shaking his head at the memory.

"Hmm." Is all I said. Thinking about what he had just shared. Conrad Fisher tried to make me jealous.

"Well it worked." I said looking over at him.

"Did it?" He asked rubbing my shoulder.

"It did."

We walked back into the party and Steven was playing Katie's drums and playing them badly. Katie looked on with humor and adoration as he clashed the symbol.

Jeremiah was lounged on a floating pool lounger in the pool with his shirt off and bikini-clad giggling girls spinning him around and hanging on his every word.

I laughed at the scene and Conrad looked on to see what I was laughing at.

"Who is more like my dad now?" Conrad whispered in my ear, tickling me and making me laugh even more. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer.

Conrad looked down on me with… joy. It was in his eyes and I had never seen him look so consistently happy in all of my time knowing him. He was all the time, reserved and cool. He was never this… showy with his feelings.

"Want to go upstairs?" I asked as I reached for a bottle of vodka from the grill stand.

"What?" He asked with shock and a little excitement.

"Upstairs." I whispered pointing my eyes towards the second level of the house.

"Okay." He said as he grabbed two solo cups and led me into the house.

We all but scurried up the stairs giggling and smiling like two little teenaged rebels. He went into my room when I thought we would go into his.

"Is this okay?" Conrad asked as he sat on my bed.

"Sitting on my bed?" I asked confused.

"No being in here instead of my room." He said smiling at me with a secret thought.

"I don't mind. Although, I don't know what makes this look like a fun place to have a mini-party." I said shutting the door behind me.

"What is not fun. Look there is Junior Mint and Miss Priss, and there is your unicorn I got a you a long time ago. What is it's name?" He asked walking over to the chipped glass unicorn Conrad had gotten me for my birthday a long time ago.

"I never named it." I said.

"You never named it?" He asked with shock and then added, "and why not?"

"I don't know? It was too precious to name." I said simply.

Conrad smiled and walked over to me.

"Would you like a little drink?" He asked.

"Yes I would actually." I said walking over to the bed and sitting down and crossing my legs.

He poured a little in the cup and handed it to me and then did the same for himself.

"To us?" He cheered and asked.

"Yes to us." I said clinking our plastic cups together.

We spent some time talking. I asked him where the accent from earlier came from and he said he didn't know which made us both throw our heads back and laugh. He was so warm now. Loving. He was sharing with me and he asked me questions. He asked me about Spain and about Anika and Carlos's wedding. He asked about Benito and what he was like. He asked me what my favorite memory from high school was. I told him it was when he came to visit me for Valentines day.

"That doesn't count." He said lazily. He was boarder-line drunk now. I hadn't seen him like this since that time he was drunk at the party Cam took my to for a date.

"Yes it does!" I said and turned to put my legs up on the wall. My mind was fuzzy and floppy. It was a nice feeling.

Conrad just laid beside me shaking his head.

"When was the first time you knew you loved me?" He asked.

"When I realized I loved you or when I realized I would love you forever." I said staring up at my feet.

I could hear him smile.

"Forever." He said.

"Well it is our theme isn't it?" I paused for a moment. "It was father's day. You were thirteen and your dad didn't show up. But you did what you said you were going to do and you didn't complain. I remember we all ate it in silence even though it wasn't good. I don't know it was just something you did that solidified the fact that I was in love with you." I said almost as if I were just thinking about it in my head rather than share it with Conrad.

Conrad was thoughtful and sweet.

"You know I have been trying to think about the exact moment that I fell in love with you. I have been trying to pin-point the exact moment, and I can't. I know that probably isn't what you want to hear, but I would like to know myself. It is almost like I woke up one day and I knew. But it isn't that simple either. I had a girl back at school ask me if I have ever been in love and I said yes, but I can't recall when it happened." Conrad said as if he were admitting to a terrible crime.

I didn't want him feeling bad about this. Of all things in the world I was just glad to be his. I turned over to kiss him, almost to sooth him and he pulled me closer in desperate need. He needed my affection as much as I needed him. He groaned and ran his hands through my hair. Desire coursed through my body and I clung to him like a wet rag.

"Belly no." Conrad said pulling back and staring into my eyes. His eyes were a little glazed from drink and he looked stern.

"Why?" I asked in an overly breathy voice, again, Conrad was making me show how obsessed with him I was.

"Because we have both been drinking." He said sitting up.

"So? Tonight has been wonderful." I said sitting up and grabbing his hand.

"I agree, but this isn't right. Our first time should not be a drunken tryst at a party." Conrad said looking out my window into the dark night. Nothing could be seen.

I was quiet for a moment. My desire dwindling at his words and sweet affection taking its place.

"A tryst?" I asked making fun of him.

He smiled at me.

"A tryst?" I asked again making fun of him more.

"I know, I know encyclopedia boy." Conrad said laying back down and laughing so hard he held his ribs.

"Uh-huh." I said crossing my arms. His laughter made me laugh too. I have never seen him so hysterical.

The weekend at the beach passed by quickly. A lot of surfing and sun-lounging happened. Taylor had returned on Sunday sorely angry that she missed the party. Her mother cried Saturday morning when she tried to leave to make it back. Taylor had stayed the remainder of the day to placate her.

When mom returned on Monday she brought me Anika and Carlos's wedding invitation and save the date. They were post-marked two weeks apart. A shot-gun wedding I supposed.

"We should invite the lovely couple to the house." Taylor suggested as she flipped through a Cosmo magazine.

"Belly I think we should try this hair-style on you." Taylor said showing me a photo of one of the Kardashians.

"No thanks." I said returning to my own magazine.

"No thanks to Anika and Carlos or no thanks to the hair." Taylor asked.

"The hair. I actually think inviting them is a great idea." I said sitting my magazine down and reaching for my phone.

"Let me ask Conrad first. I mean we do have Samuel coming in this weekend for mom." I said reaching for my phone, but waiting for Conrad to come back from surfing.

"You have to ask?" Taylor asked pushing her sunglasses to the tip of her nose so that she could look over them at me.

"I don't have to, but this isn't my house." I said looking at her exasperated.

"It will be one day, and besides you are dating Conrad. He thinks you walk on water now. I would have never though that grumpy thing would show some life. He smiles more than I have ever seen him smile." Taylor said turning back to her magazine.

"I still think it would be polite to ask." I said looking on Anika's social media page to check out her and Carlo's engagement photos.

Conrad and the boys came walking back up the beach laughing at something Steven must have said.

Conrad walked straight over to me and laid down over top of me getting me completely wet. He was so cold. He got up and said, "Oh excuse me ma'am." And it made me giggle. I shivered from how cold he was.

"Yes. Excuse you." I said tossing my wet magazine to the concrete.

His eyes were filled with mirth. Yeah, keep laughing Fisher.

"So… I know Samuel is coming this weekend, but do you think there is room for two more?" I asked. He looked at me like it was a silly question.

"Of course that is fine. Who is coming?" He asked.

"Anika and her fiancé Carlos. If they can come." I said smiling at him. He was clearly checking me out.

"Are you listening?" I asked. He replied, "huh?" for effect. I knew he did hear me though. Why wasn't he more like this last night?

"Yeah that sounds good. It would be nice to meet Carlos." Conrad said as he got up to put his surf board away.

I swooned as I watched him strut away.

"Yep. I don't know who has taken over the body of Conrad Fisher." Taylor said shaking her head at his retreating figure.

I smiled in his direction.

"Me neither, but I don't mind." I said practically hugging myself.

*SORRY THIS WAS LATE I HAVE BEEN SICK! THANKS FOR HANGING IN THERE. Check back next week for more! I am going to jump ahead soon so bare with me!

THANK YOU FOR READING*


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Mom left to go pick up Samuel from the airport about ten minutes earlier. It was an hours ride to get to the airport, so it would be a good while before they were back. Jermeiah made the comment to me that I was preparing for the president's arrival. It was something that was half-true. Although, I had my guard up as well just to make sure that this guy was good enough for my mom, because I thought of my dad to be one of the sweetest men and the world and he didn't even make it too long with my mother. She obviously had strong feelings towards this guy. What really bothered me is that she felt like he wouldn't come and visit her here if she had asked him herself. That didn't settle well with me. We also had Anika and Carlos coming later in the morning, so we were going to have a full house.

I busied myself by going to the grocery store with Taylor and picking out flowers to bring a little bit of Susannah to the occasion. The boys were occupying their time today fishing with some other guys from the beach.

I decided while we were at the store that I wanted to try and bake a cake for Samuel.

"Belly, you have no idea what kind of cake this guy likes, and what if we mess it up?" Taylor complained as she walked beside the grocery cart.

"Taylor, it is a boxed cake. The ingredients are on the back. We are adults. We can follow instructions."

When we got back to the house we started the cake first. We were worried that it wouldn't be ready by the time Anika and Carlos arrived. Taylor was in charge of measuring and I had put myself in charge of finding the mixer and preheating the oven.

"Belly how do we know these are large eggs?" Taylor asking with her head inside the refrigerator.

"It says it on the carton." I said deadpan.

"Oh, I knew that." She said and laughed at herself.

I smiled and shook my head. We had followed every instruction to the T. The house started filling up with the smell of fresh baked goods when I heard a car pull into the driveway.

"That must be the happy couple." I said smiling triumphantly. We had moved mom into Susannah's room. If anybody deserved staying in that room, it was my mom. We had planned on putting Anika and Carlos in my mom's room. We decked it out with candles and rose pedals like they were on their honeymoon. We hoped they would like it.

Taylor and I rounded the corner of hallway into the foyer and ran to open the door. Taylor opened the door and as our guests came into view. I saw the very tall Benito first, because he was so tall and I blanched before I could even welcome Anika and Carlos. Anika looked sorry, but Carlos looked as unaffected and innocent as ever.

"Hey!" Taylor said in the most cheerful voice she could manage and she zeroed in on Benito and turned to look at me raising her eyebrows. Just once. I knew what that meant.

"Hey Isabel!" Anika said taking me into a ginormous hug. She whispered into my ear, "I am so sorry he just showed up last night. Carlos didn't tell me." She released me with apologetic eyes and winked to let her know that it was okay. Even though I was freaking out on the inside. Conrad would not like this.

"Carlos!" I said wrapping him into a hug as well.

"Hello Isabel, this place is so beautiful. I must see the ocean." Carlos said walking further into the house and looking around.

"Hi Benito." I said smiling up at him with a reserved politeness. It was the politeness I would often use at work.

"Hey." He said shyly from the entrance to the house.

Taylor gladly engaged Benito in some small talk as we all ventured towards the stairs.

"Let me show you your room, so that you can put your bags somewhere." I said as we all started up the stairs.

"I guess Benito can either sleep in your room with you guys or I can see if my brother is okay with Benito sharing the twin bed in his room?" I asked as we wondered down the hall towards my mom's room.

"I guess we will wait to figure that out when we can ask Steven." Anika said as we walked into the room we had romantically decked out for her and Carlos.

"Guys this is so pretty." Anika said and Carlos agreed enthusiastically as he placed their luggage on the floor near the closet.

"We thought we would welcome you with a romantic suite." Taylor said batting her eyes at Benito. He seemed to like the attention well-enough.

Once we all started back down the stairs the buzzer to the oven was going off and I wondered how long it could have been going off. The air did not smell as wonderfully as it did before.

"Oh no! The cake!" I said running the rest of the way down.

We indeed, did burn the cake, and I got rid of the evidence so that the boys would not make fun of me when they returned. I forced Taylor to help me start opening windows to get rid of the evidence, because it was partly her fault as well.

"This stinks. I really wanted this to be special." I said pouting and scrubbing the baking pan we had been baking the cake in.

"Want me to run back to the bakery and grab a cake and say we baked it?" Taylor asked.

I smiled and nodded. She smiled and nodded too and took Benito with her since she said she didn't like to go places alone. She was a trip. She even brought back a cookie scented candle to make it seem like we had been baking. That is why she is one of my best friends.

The boys finally arrived back waltzing into the kitchen to see what the smell was and they were all astonished that me and Taylor had "made a cake" that looked so good. Conrad didn't look convinced even though he didn't say anything.

"So I am dating Betty Crocker now?" He asked teasing me.

"Looks like you are." I replied flirtatiously.

Conrad chuckled and nodded as if he appreciated my spunk or something.

"So I have something to tell you." I said all of the sudden nervous about telling Conrad about Benito.

"What?" He asked intrigued. I fiddled nervously and scrunched my nose.

"What?" He asked again. I blew out a breath and smiled charmingly at him.

"So don't be mad, but Benito is kinda in the rec room." I said peeking up at him nervously.

"Why?" Conrad asked. He didn't seem mad, only confused.

"Because he just showed up at Anika's parents' house last night and Carlos didn't even tell Anika that he was coming." I said exasperated.

"Oh, well alright then." Conrad said taking a carrot stick from a vegetable plate I had gotten earlier. He dipped it in ranch.

"Alright then?" I asked a little let down by the lack of jealousy coming from my man's reaction.

"Yeah, s'not a big deal." He said through the crunching of the carrot.

"Fine then. I will see if he wants to hang out." I said jokingly and a little defiantly.

Conrad narrowed his eyes at me. "Oh yeah?" He challenged.

"Yeah." I said walking over to the fridge to get a grape popsicle.

"Fine I will come watch." Conrad said, dusting his hands like something was on them and gesturing for me to lead the way.

I didn't move.

"Why aren't you jealous?" I asked exasperated. My popsicle rapper crunched violently with my attitude.

Conrad laughed. "I have you and I know that. He doesn't even live in America." Conrad said unaffectedly.

I laughed too. I knew I was being silly, but I just wanted to see him act like he is as obsessed with me as I am him, and I wasn't used to the attention that he did give me now. It was like once he gave me some attention, I craved for so much more.

Everyone came to us and sat around the large kitchen in comradery as Steven and Jeremiah charmed Anika and Carlos. They liked Carlos and Benito's accents so they would encourage them to speak. Benito snuck glances at me more times than I felt comfortable with. It was weird to look at him now and remember that his lips used to know mine. I wondered if Conrad thought about that. It is weird. He should notice that.

Conrad stood beside me against the island in the center of the kitchen. He didn't have his arm around me or touch me, which I wished he would so Benito could see that I was with someone else now.

I heard a car pull into the drive and shushed everyone just so that I could hear the car doors shut to make sure. "They are here." I announced and fidgeted in anticipation. Once I noticed that I was doing this I tried to find some calm to make it look like I was completely unaffected by what was about to happen.

The front door opened and I heard the bass of what could only belong to a male voice that registered that he was here with my mom.

"Kids?" Mom called from the foyer.

"In here." Steven replied. I am glad he replied because I would have been overly loud from nerves.

Once they entered the kitchen I smiled from ear to ear because they looked like a couple that belonged together.

Samuel was just as handsome as he was in his picture on the school's website. He was just a hair taller than mom, which was okay because my mom never really wore heels. He had this intelligence behind his eyes that was not cold and cross, but warm and welcoming. Like he would say, "Come here and let me happily teach you all of the wonders of the world." My own father used to have that look, but I have not seen it since I was a little girl.

"Belly, Steven come here." Mom said and I walked over and became shy all of the sudden. I was old enough to not be that way, but here I was acting like I was a four-year-old.

"Samuel this is Steven and Isabel, we all call her Belly." "Kids this is Samuel."

Samuel looked over both of us with a fond smile, like he already knew us.

"Steven, it is a pleasure to meet you. I have heard that you are graduating this winter. That is great!" He said giving him a firm man's handshake. Steven straightened his back and shoulders a little bit and nodded and said, "Yes sir, I am going to be a computer engineer." He seemed proud and goad. I wanted to pinch him for it.

"And Isabel, you are a sight my dear! Your mother has talked so well of you. How did you like Spain?" He asked me with so much interest that it took me off guard.

"It was wonderful. It was one of the best times of my life." I said looking up into his hazel eyes. He was so handsome. My mom had a cutie. I bet all of the female and some male students flirted with him. His charisma and accent drew you in as well as this other undescribable air he had about him. I smiled up at him with no-holds-baring approval.

"Will you continue your travels Isabel?" He asked.

"Oh I hope so, and you can call me Belly." I told him and he smiled as if it were a gift.

"Alright Belly. That is what I like to hear. I would love to tell you of some of the most wonderful places in the world if you are up for it. It doesn't have to be now because this is a joyous occasion, but I would love to tell you about some of the places your mother and I have adventured." He said with a warm smile at my mother. She was watching him with silent admiration that showed only because I knew her so well now. She looked at him as if she loved him.

"I would love that." I said inviting them further into the kitchen to show them that we had made them a cake. Mom seemed surprised and she didn't comment about the cake either. Even though the bakery that Taylor got it from served it on the regular.

Mom introduced Samuel to Jeremiah next. He had already met Conrad so he shook his hand and told him that he was happy to see him again.

Jeremiah was putty in his hands and wanted to talk about where he had been too. Cabo and England.

"I just want you two boys to know that I am so sorry that I never got to meet the infamous Susannah Beck. Laurel here cannot tell me many stories that she is not a part of and I just wish that she was here so that I could meet her too. She is kind of the reason why me and Laurel met. I would never have met her if it wasn't for the lone trip that Laurel took after her passing. We were at the airport and I was sitting at a table reading a book outside a bar and Laurel was at the bar drinking a martini." He paused and grabbed my mom's hand sweetly and kissed it right in front of all of us. And then continued. "She was crying and I wouldn't have noticed if it was for the tear drop I saw fall onto the bar top. I was not sitting too far away from her, because the table I was sitting at belonged to the bar. Anyways, I watched her. She sipped her martini and had the most still in a statue like beauty, strong, elegant, lines from her cheek bones that pointed to her mouth. She was breathtaking. She was just so mysterious to me. So I watched her for a bit longer. A heavier fellow tried talking to her and she turned her whole body in her stool in my direction and it made me laugh and she saw it. She saw my smile and then her stone face melted into a small smirk that indicated that she too, knew that what she did was both rude and funny. I didn't think her sad face could be topped in beauty until I saw her smile, and then that was it. I walked over and it turned out we were on the same flight. I switched seats with a small older lady. She didn't mind first class and I didn't mind coach with Laurel. We spent every day together on that trip."

As he finished his story I felt tears well into my eyes and I tried to hide behind Conrad's bulky shoulder and he looked back and down at me over his shoulder and chuckled as I dashed a tear away. It was one of the most romantic stories that I had ever heard.

Taylor vocalized that thought.

"I wish they still made guys like you Samuel." She sighed as he watched him adore my mother and my mother look shy and as elegant as he described in his story. I then felt extremely self-conscious. I was floppy and not very lady-like at times and I felt a pang of regret for chasing these dang boys around my whole life. I didn't think for one second that a man would call me elegant or statue-like in beauty. I showed every emotion clear on my face as I thought it. I was a clear and open window while my mother was a tinted window with interesting curtains and beads that hid what was on the inside.

Conrad noticed my behavior of course. Open window and all. "What is wrong?" He whispered down at me.

"Nothing." I said shaking my head.

He knew not to prompt me further. If I wanted to share my insecurities with him - I most likely would not - but if I wanted to I could without him pesting me.

I had almost forgotten about Benito's intrusion until my mom talked to him and spoke to him about how she was glad I met him and whatnot. Conrad didn't seem to mind the comment. I was almost annoyed at how self-assured he was. I would never feel that secure with us. Unless we were married and that would be ages away. Sour from my thoughts I excused myself to the back patio and sat down near the pool to put my feet in.

"What is wrong belles?" Jeremiah asked.

"Nothing." I said grumpily.

"Oh touchy touchy. Turning into Conrad?" He asked a little sharper than I liked.

"So what if I am?" I snapped back. Conrad and I had been a thing long enough for this shit to be a thing of the past.

"You know I am joking. I am sorry. Fine I'll go back inside." Jeremiah said as if he were scorned.

He always knew how to make me feel bad for him.

"Jeremiah." I said stopping him.

"Yeah?" He said.

"I am sorry I just need a minute."

He nodded and returned inside. Mom came out as he went inn.

"What are you doing out here?" Mom asked joining me in the foot soak.

"Just thinking." I said moving my feet against the water.

"Care to share?" Mom asked.

"Do you think I am good enough for Conrad?" I asked. Moms expression grew stern and I didn't understand her reason.

"Why would you ask that?" Mom did not like what I had said at all.

"Because. Samuel described how perfect you are, mysterious, elegant, a beauty. I am none of those things." I admitted in a whisper.

"Can I share something with you?" Mom whispered back in conspiracy.

I nodded.

"You are elegant. You are so much like me when I was your age that it is scary. Conrad is to you like your dad was to me. I thought the sun and moon revolved around him until I grew out of it and your dad stopped motivating me and I stopped making him happy. We grew apart. Not to say that will happen to you two, but what I am saying is, is that you will soon see yourself and you will be a force to reckon with. Conrad already knows this because he has told me. He said that you become more otherworldly every single time he sees you. But remember, it doesn't matter how he feels of you it is how you feel of yourself. Don't ever let a man determine your own self-worth. It is nice to hear good things but only if they are pure in intention."

I was silent. Soaking in everything she said. Trying not to linger on "otherworldly".

"Thanks mom." I said and sat in silence for a few minutes smiling as the wind danced across my face, too soon we got up and ventured back inside.

Samuel was at the center of every conversation and I am positive that Jeremiah had found his hero. He overly tried to make Samuel laugh, but he failed more than succeeded. His humor more-so confided the scholar more than anything. Although, Jeremiah's crude frat boy humor wasn't something the European instructor had crossed before.

Conrad was finally touching me. I wondered if it was because of Benito's increasing attention or if it was genuine. After my talk with mom, I hoped it was genuine.

"I love you." He mouthed down at me.

I squeezed him closer to me and kissed his cheek.

I mouthed, "You know I love you." He smiled and pulled me into a grand kids in front of the whole room.

"Turn it down!" Steven complained.

"Never." Conrad said to Steven "Why you guys ever liked my sister is beyond me." Steven jokingly said to Jeremiah and Benito who both looked up at me like it wasn't a past-tense thing. I stepped behind Conrad for a moment and flipped Steven off behind Conrad's back.

"You know. There are some f-u gestures in other cultures that you all may find pretty interesting." Samuel said staring at my dancing middle finger. I was embarrassed that he noticed and mom rolled her eyes because she knew well-enough that I had indeed, flipped my older brother off.

"Well let's hear them." Carlos said enthusiastically making us all laugh.

*As always thank you to everyone who had been reading and encouraging me to continue this story. Thank you for your patience as well. As I am currently doing finals in pursuit of getting a degree in creative writing it has put me behind on getting these chapters out, as well as being sick recently. Just hang in there with me.. I have had to spend my time writing other things. THANK YOU SO SO MUCH! I will try to submit chapter 9 before next Monday! You all rock!*


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

 **Jumping forward to Anika and Carlos' Wedding**

 _Conrad_

As I drive us down the interstate towards Anika's hometown, where she will be getting married later today, a flash of movement grabs my attention from my peripherals. Belly, who has been asleep for the past forty-five minutes, is awake now and she must've took her hair out of it's braid because her hair is whipping around in the wind from the open window. She always takes her hair down if the windows are down. It makes her look wild and free, which she is.

She looks thoughtful and carefree and I know for a fact that she does not know how effortlessly beautiful she is, and maybe that is a good thing, because if she knew she certainly wouldn't be with me.

I think she will be one of those women who ages beautifully, like my mom. Like she will look like a forty-year-old when she is in her mid-fifties.

She catches me staring at her and pushes her wild hair out of her face. Her smile is playful, almost challenging as she winks at me from her side of the car. Her brown hair catches light from the sun that has just risen over the trees. The morning light on the side of her face that is hidden from me lines the profile of her face with a golden hue, making her look like a fairy that knows all the secrets in the world. Or maybe even an angel.

"Good morning." I say to her and she rewards me with a smile again.

"How much longer?" She asks me as she props her feet up on the dashboard.

"About another hour." I say to her. She leans up so that she can reach the radio and turns up an Eagles song.

She bobs her head as she listens to the infamous guitar solo in 'Hotel California', I used to try to play it like them. Never could though.

Her actions take me back to when she and Jeremiah danced to that god-awful Britney Spears song all those years ago. Back when they were trying to help me with my exams. I fiercely remember how much it bothered me that Jeremiah was flirting with her on that trip. I mean, I knew that he liked her, it just didn't seem like I would actually ever let him have her.

Thinking about it now I couldn't believe that I had let him have her twice. The first time I told him her could have her in the hotel after the storm. The second time was on their wedding day after he told me to say goodbye to her and made me agree that I would never see either of them again.

Looking over at my girl now, I couldn't imagine ever letting her down or hurting her ever again, and especially couldn't imagine letting her go.

We are almost to the Holiday Inn Express. I don't know what makes this particular Holiday Inn an Express, but we were bound to find out. I wonder idly if there even was a difference. It was one of two hotels in the small town and it had one more star than the other. It had three stars to the others two. Three out of five was definitely preferable to two out of five.

The whole "getting a hotel room together" thing was an awkward subject to breach. Belly had been giving me plenty of signals that suggested that she was ready for more, but she always has been ready for more when it came to us.

The thing is, is that I am too. Boy am I ready to be close with her. But I have only been reunited with her for three months, which I know sounds like nothing in comparison to how long I have known her. It just didn't feel right. It felt too early, too soon. I didn't want to mess this up again.

I felt as though I had a lot of making up to do for her. I wouldn't want to take advantage of her and her forgiving nature.

While I drove closer to town I contemplated the weekend, and the choices that I would prevent from being made. This was the first formal function that I was taking Belly to since her prom.

Her prom.

Her prom night is one of my biggest regrets that I have ever had. I can honestly say that I am a man who doesn't regret much. I am usually comfortable with my decisions and know exactly what I want, but that night is the night that makes me cringe at a single thought.

I can still remember the look in her eyes that night when I wanted to leave. I was so angry that she could see through me. I was angry that I couldn't be there for her. I couldn't even be there for myself.

Belly's whole prom felt like a foggy dream. There is not much about it that I can remember. I was lost in worry and thought. I saw my mom the night before and I had never seen her look so sick. I mean, she had been sick for a while and had spouts of good days and bad, but that night she looked too thin. Too tired. Too pale.

She was in her bedroom talking to my dad on the phone. Work had called him out of town for that weekend, and he was playing the role of concerned husband by calling to check in on her. Used to, he wouldn't call her until he was on his way back.

I was walking by her room to go to my room and I stopped when I heard her voice. She hadn't talked much that day. She was nauseated from the chemo and couldn't hold anything down. So hearing her talk made me stop still to listen to her. I stood against the wall outside of her opened door. I closed my eyes and tried to hear everything about her voice. The inflection of excitement when she liked something you told her, and she wanted to make you feel like it was the most special and wonderful thing in the world. The noise she made before she laughed. And especially her laugh. Jeremiah was good at making mom laugh. When I was home I liked sharing a room with them just to hear it.

Then her voice grew sad. She was crying, "Adam, it will be okay… yes… oh, I love you too…You know that it is okay…. Yes you do…" And there… My mom, having cancer, was having to placate and sooth my father and here she was the one dying. And then I thought past my annoyance at my father's weak character. My mom is dying.

Prom faded into the background. I wanted so badly to yell or punch something. It was so unfair. My mom was supposed to see me graduate, get married, and have kids. And every day she grew sicker and I just knew she was not going to be here much longer. She was going to miss my life.

I was going to a high school prom and nothing seemed more disgusting to me than that. Besides my dad and his stupidity. I was going to have to pretend to be happy with Belly, and I wasn't good at pretending.

That night Belly looked beautiful. She looked like she stepped out of another time. She came down the stairs and I fidgeted uncomfortably, because I just wasn't in any mood to be around anyone.

I forgot Belly's corsage and Steve's date had given Belly something as a replacement. That was something else that soured my mood further. How quickly I was able to disappoint her.

It was after that happened that made me really not want to go. I debated on leaving as soon as we left Laurel's sight. I doubted that she would have forgiven me for leaving Belly dateless on her first prom night ever.

Belly was still hopeful while she glanced over at me and put her hand in the middle seat between us, in hopes that I would hold her hand. It wasn't something I was in the mood for either. So I didn't take it.

I didn't do a lot of things that night. And it was the night we broke up. It was a night I really didn't want to break up. But it was for the best. She would have wound up hating me by the time my mom did die anyways.

Little did Belly know that this time. This time, at a formal function as her date, I was going to get it right.

I had pre-ordered a small corsage that matched her light yellow bridesmaids dress.

I had planned on charming her college friends and give her what she has wanted for so long. I would be a good boyfriend and I would deserve the title.

"Watcha thinking about?" Belly asked. Bringing me back to her.

"You." I answered simply.

"Me? Why Conrad, I am ever so flattered." Belly said smiling and truly looking flattered.

"Well even you know that flattery is like chewing gum. Enjoy it, but don't swallow it." I replied hoping to rile her up.

"Well! I was going to say that flattery will get you everywhere, but no keep talking Fisher." Belly said shaking her head and grimacing. I loved a riled up Belly. She always said and did the funniest things. It was just cute.

"Oh, and you have dust on your nose, oh wait." I said licking my thumb and attempting to swipe the freckles on the bridge of her nose.

"Excuse me. I don't think so." She said grabbing my thumb and pulling it to her mouth to bite it lightly.

I feigned hurt feelings.

"Ouch. Rude." I said trying and failing to hide my amusement.

"Darn right. I am rude." She said turning to stick my tongue out at him.

"Still a child." I said smiling at her.

"You are so… so… annoying." Belly said taking her feet off of my dash. Then she smiled like she had an idea.

"I guess I will have to call Benito and tell him that I have changed my mind about his offer. Oh wait, we will see him later so I can tell him then." She had a smug smile on her face as she crossed her arms.

I chuckled because it was outrageous.

She is referencing the night we all went out for a celebratory dinner and Benito had asked Belly to go with him to the pier. She said sure, and went since I had told her that I wasn't threatened by him the day before.

They came back twenty minutes later, which to me felt more like two hours.

Jeremiah's grin and hooded eyes of spite didn't help. He was still as crazy about her as ever. He just hid it from her well, and I only tolerated it because he was my little brother.

Benito looked forlorn and Belly looked embarrassed. The entire table was so quiet that the noises from their scooting chairs made everything even more awkward.

Belly looked at me like, "What on earth?" I was curious about what happened, but I didn't want to ask at the table.

Then my mind went straight to the thought that he made a move. I cut my eyes at him and gripped the edge of the table. I turned back to Belly.

"Did he touch you?" I whispered vehemently.

"No." She replied, taken aback by my question.

I calmed and glared at him once more for good measure. He noticed the glare, but had the decency not to provoke my bad temper any further. Smart guy.

"So… who wants to go home and camp out on the beach?" Steven asked, breaking the silence. He was trying to make things less awkward.

"Me bro." Jeremiah said smiling from ear to ear.

"Alright." Steven said offering Jere a fist to bump.

"What about you Con?" Steve asked with a smile that didn't match with the tenseness around his eyes.

"No." I said quickly. Steve didn't ask any further.

Belly poked my arm to get my attention. I looked down at her and she wrapped her arms around my bicep and rested her chin on my shoulder. I could tell she was happy. Yes, Belly I get jealous. I know, I thought internally. I rolled my eyes at her and smiled. She smiled bigger and kissed my arm and I felt even calmer than before.

I smiled down at her and then turned back to Steve who looked fidgety.

"Steve, camping sounds good." He smiled in triumph.

Benito's proposal was for Belly to run away with him back to Spain. Belly said that she laughed at him and it was awkward because he was being serious. She apologized and suggested that they head back to dinner.

We arrived at the hotel at ten. Belly had to be at the church by eleven, so she quickly showered and dressed in the bathroom. She comes out and is wearing her bridesmaid button up, "uniform", as I call it. She says it looks cute in pictures. Not that I needed to know.

She wore cut-off shorts that were super short and her uniform shirt almost hid them completely. Her legs went on and on. She towel-dried her hair and brushed it out. She didn't have any makeup on, and she didn't need it. That is how I had always known her, without makeup. Tanned face and natural, but as she is a woman now, and woman do wear makeup. It was something I was getting used to. I was just glad that she never had to worry about it with me.

She reached for the bag that held her dress. Then she turned to me.

"Be there at 2:30 so that I can see you in your snazzy clothes before the wedding." She reminded me.

"Yes, baby." I said from the bed. I was watching a fishing show. Wait, I just said baby… but I have never said that to anyone before. I especially had never called Belly that, even when I joked around with her. Her eyes were as wide as mine. She hid her surprise like nothing happened.

"Was that weird?" I asked, extremely embarrassed about what just happened.

Belly walked over to me with a small and shy smile.

"No, I loved it." She whispered as she leaned down to kiss me.

"Okay, baby." I said back to her and her face broke into an even bigger smile.

"Okay, baby." She replied with a smile.

Her phone buzzed in her hand.

"Oh no, I have to go. Taylor has been downstairs for five minutes waiting to pick me up." She made an oops face.

Her panic was cute. I smiled fondly.

"I guess you'd better hurry then." I said sarcastically.

"I love you! Bye!" She said over her shoulder as she ran towards the door.

"I love you too." I called after her retreating form. And then when the door clicked shut behind her I thought, we didn't wait to say, I love you. I shook my head. Still doesn't make it the right time.

I went to pick up the corsage at 2:00 and the lady at the florist smiled when I told her that it was for my girlfriend.

"Corsages are all the rage with them hipsters who go on dates with their girls who wear those big squared glasses and old dresses. You know the type. Is this what you are doing? You don't look like the type." The old lady says. She has a candor that I usually enjoy. She seems to say whatever pops into her mind.

"Well I am not hipster. I just owe my girl a corsage." I say handing her my debit card.

I check my reflection in a ginormous, shiny black truck before I walk to the side of the church were the girls have been getting ready all day.

Taylor, who is here today to do the girls makeup comes out as I am waiting outside of the door.

She is texting when she finally notices me. "Oh, Conrad. Let me go get Belly." She offers disappearing back into the room.

"Thanks." I say fidgeting with my tie with the hand that isn't holding the corsage box.

Belly comes out looking like an angelic fairy. Her hair is swept back into a low up-do. She is not wearing too much makeup. Just enough to highlight what is already there.

"Belly…" I am at a loss for something to say.

She looks me up and down raising an eyebrow.

"Conrad." She says provocatively.

I smirk at her.

"Belly you look breathtaking. Like I don't know what to say." I admit.

It was like when I saw her outside before my mom's garden opening ceremony at the Women's Center. Belly looked unreachable, until I saw the band aid on her knee.

Here I am again looking for some sign of this angel being my Belly.

She spins for me once and her skirt blossoms up around her.

"Why thank you. You look great too." She says smiling and scrunching her nose in the way she does – there she is, I thought.

"I have this for you." I said reaching out to hand her the box.

"Conrad." She says breathless.

"I owe you, one corsage and a night full of dancing." I say hoping I did well.

She doesn't say anything as she crushes herself to me.

"Can I?" I ask. She nods and hands the box back to me.

I take her thin and delicate wrist in my hand and slip on the small corsage in one move.

She touches the small Gerber daisies with her left hand. Then I take a small box out of my jacket pocket and hand it to her.

"Now pin me." I say offering her the lapel of my jacket

She opens the box and pulls out a matching daisy to pin to my coat. She furrows her brow in concentration as she does it.

"Don't stab me." I plead.

"You'd be so lucky." She responds.

When she is done she steps back to observe her handiwork.

"Now people know you're my girl." I say kissing her hand. The hand the corsage is on.

"I love you." She says simply.

"I love you." I agree, then add, "I know you have to go, so I am going to go find my seat." I say kissing her once more in retreat.

She smiles and walks backward into the room. I smile back at her. I always hate leaving her.

I make my way to the congregation so that I can be ushered to my seat. A small, somewhere around a ten-year-old, boy leads the way and I smile down at him as he counts the aisles.

"Know which one is mine?" I ask.

He rolls his eyes.

"Yes." He says offended.

I enjoy his offense.

He looks up at me and raises an eyebrow.

"Why are you wearing a girl's flower? You aren't in the wedding." The boy asks bewildered that am wearing a flower when I don't have to.

"Why? You are wearing one?" I ask him.

He shakes his head. "I am Anika's little brother. I have to dress up and look nice. Not that girl flowers are so nice." He says as we make it to the aisle. He makes a point to eye my corsage again.

"You are seat number four. Don't think for second that I won't notice is you go to three or five." The little boy says.

"I wouldn't dare." I say chuckling.

The little boy pauses and walks away and then pauses again just to make sure I didn't move.

I smile and wave.

The church begins filling up. I check my phone and the wedding is supposed to start in ten minutes, not that I know much about weddings. I have only heard that they normally run behind.

Not this one though. The wedding starts right on cue and all of the people turn to watch the family members get escorted by the groomsmen and younger ushers. This wedding was bigger than I expected.

It feels like forever before the wedding party actually comes out. The groomsmen and Carlos come out of a side door towards the back of the church. Carlos is crying and his buddies are trying to get him to stop.

Anika's little brother who is standing up with the guys shakes his head and places his hand on his forehead as if he couldn't believe it.

It makes me chuckle, so I have to place my hand over my mouth to hide my smile.

Anika's mom must've scolded him because the little boy is waving his hands in the direction of Carlos and mouthing, "What? What is that all about?" It makes a couple of the older men laugh and Anika's mom turns to scold them too.

I shrink down in my seat so that I won't get caught smiling.

The music starts again and it prompts everyone to turn around. I turn. Luckily I am sitting beside a single mom and her two small children, who are surprisingly well-behaved. I am able to see over them. The flower girl comes down and she makes everyone laugh because she is really small and adorable. The bridesmaids come down. Belly is third, and she is doing her duty as a bridesmaid by looking happy and proud of being there, which she is. Belly loved everything. I know for a fact that I do have the most beautiful girl in the world. It is hard not to be proud of that. But not only is she the most beautiful, but she is the realest person in the world. She lets me see every side of her, without fear.

Somehow in the big church she spots me and gives me a special smile. I feel so lucky. The mother beside me looks to see who she was smiling at. She smiles when she sees the grin on my face.

We are prompted to stand while Anika comes down the aisle in a long cream gown and long veil to match. Carlos starts sobbing and it makes all of the women in the church cry. The guys beside him are all smiling at Anika and the Benito, who is the best man is rubbing his hands together and tearing up himself.

Anika's father gives her away, warily. He seems to be uncomfortable with Carlos's tears as well. He says what he is supposed to and shuffles to his seat.

Anika's sister is crying too. Let me sum it up. Everyone is crying. Except for most of the American men and some of the other groomsmen.

Anika and Carlos look happy together. They are a good match. She is the solid ground to his light and passionate personality. I only hung out with him for a few days, but he was intrigued by everything. It was a nice change.

They say their vows and kiss. The church erupts in applause and they leave first smiling and laughing. Carlos keeps her in his arms and twirls and dip-kisses her in front of everyone. She blushes, but is okay with the attention.

Carlos's side of the family is much more vocal. They shout to them in Spanish and woot and the women applaud and laugh at him spinning her. This was truly a very happy day in time.

Belly is waiting for me outside of the church doors. She runs into my arms. Her eyes are still puffy from crying at the wedding.

"Wasn't that the sweetest thing you have ever seen?" She asks me.

"It was very emotional." I say deadpan.

She smacks my arm with her bouquet and laughs. "Yeah Connor got a good lecture from his mom after the ceremony for that behavior." Belly says laughing.

"Connor?" I ask.

"Oh, Anika's little brother." She explains.

"Oh yeah, now that was funny. He was saying what we were all thinking. He seems like a cool kid." I say.

"Don't let Gene, Anika's mom, hear that. She will ream you out too." Belly warns.

"Yeah I don't want that to happen." I say placing my hands on her waist.

"I have to take a few pictures and then I will meet you down at the reception hall. It is at that big tent in the field." Belly explains.

"Okay, well I will just follow the crowd." I say sarcastically.

"Conrad Fisher, following the crowd? I never would have thunk it." Belly says making fun of me.

"Yeah, well if you can't beat em' join em'." I say shrugging my shoulders.

"That sounds like solid logic… for someone who doesn't like to work hard." Belly teases further. I love seeing her so happy.

"Yeah well, they actually need me down at the reception tent … so I better get going." I say awkwardly, like she is the one holding me up. I stuff my hands into my pockets and stroll towards the door.

Belly laughs and heads towards the bridal party.

"Can't keep them waiting." Belly says, and I don't know if she is joking about me or being serious about her.

 ***FIRST OFF THANK YOU! I wanted to get this out early since everyone has been so patient with me over the past few weeks. I hope you enjoy the jump ahead from Conrad's POV. It is fun writing a happy version of him. Thank you for your reviews and for reading! ***


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